238. Choose the Right Words to Grow Your Business

Transcript:

  Welcome to the Connected For Real podcast. I’m Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman, a marriage coach for women in business. And my mission is to bring God’s presence into your life, into your marriage and into your business. Let’s get started.  And we are live. Welcome, everyone, to the Connected for Real podcast. I’m Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman. I’m a marriage coach for women in business, and I’m so excited. Today, our topic is words and business. And today with me, I have Rebecca. Rebecca, introduce yourself and tell everyone why they should listen. Hi. Happy to be here. This is awesome. So my name’s Rebecca, and I’m a, mostly a copywriter and content strategist, I like to call myself. So I work with coaches and service-based business owners mostly. And I help them with landing pages, and I help them with any writing needs they have, content strategy. We do clarity sessions. And so I have done for you digital products, and I have done with you services where we work together and write content and copywriting, messaging strategy. And then I have done for you where I just do it all for them. So I do all that. Cool. And I’m, I mostly focus on the pre-selling. I help people figure out what their audience needs to hear so they’re ready to buy, so you don’t just feel like you’re selling to a cold audience of people, or you think you have an audience that doesn’t wanna buy, freebie seekers, this kind of thing. So I like to help people warm up their audience before they even begin to try to offer something. Yeah. And that’s why we chose this topic of words and business- Yeah … because, the whole month the topic is words, and we’ve been talking about words with God, words in marriage, words with business. Next week is words and you. Yeah. And it’s really the power of words and I wanna get into that. What can people start to lean into. I was thinking about this. I’m gonna sharpen my question a little bit. Sure. I was thinking about this, and I was thinking that my love language is words. And my husband is not. His acts of service. So he doesn’t say much, but he does things, and he expects me to know that he loves me through it. And I am sitting here waiting for him to say something nice, and especially words that would build me up or affirm that I’m a good person or tell me I’m a good mom or something. Just give me something. And for him, this is like speaking Chinese. He does not understand why I need him to say it if it’s so obvious that he’s showing up for me. And so I think that a lot of people expect the business to feed into itself. People should just know to buy it ’cause it makes so much sense, or people should just understand what they’re getting because whatever. And this is why I think it’s so important to talk today about the power of words and what type of words signal to our brain that this is a good or not a good, this is a scam or not a scam. Like, how do we use the words so that people can actually hear what we mean and feel like this is right for them? Yeah. That’s amazing. I’m glad that you said that. Exactly, and that’s a good example. And it’s interesting that you said that some different love languages, right? And I think the biggest thing is because of course he loves you and he thinks you’re amazing, but he doesn’t say it, right? Yeah. So he assumes, and this is what we do as business owners too and partners, you assume, oh, that person knows. Of course they know they’re awesome. They’re so awesome. Like, why would I have to tell them that? You know what I mean? And then unless we go ahead and say, “Hey, this is something I need from you. I’m missing this,” then they’ll just take for granted that you know it. And, Yeah. Let me just put it out there- Yeah … just so you all know. Don’t worry. I have trained, I have taught- Yeah … my husband. I have communicated. Because my power is words, I communicate with words to say I really need words. I need more words. And I even tell him, I say, “Here are the exact words I need to hear.” That’s amazing. And I have to tell you, it’s so funny to see when a person is not, fluent at this language, it is very hard for them even to repeat words because they think- that’s all you need to hear. They don’t understand it, so it’s just really funny. But anyway. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And we can do that too, and like it’s one thing I wanted to bring up for sure before I even get into anything else is the… Have you ever heard of the knowledge gap? So that’s like when you know something so deeply, and you just know, you know your partner, you know the topic that you coach on. If you’re a coach, you’re a relationship coach, you know the fundamentals, you know the frameworks you know the problem the solution. You know it’s gonna work. But your audience, they don’t have that same knowledge that you have, right? So you may take for granted, like what we do, because we know this topic so well, I’m like, yeah, I take for granted that you know even what the word copywriter means, right? But so many people are like, “I have no idea what that means. Is that a lawyer? Is that… What is that?” we have to meet our audience and our partner, whoever, where they’re at, not where we assume they should be according to our, amazing knowledge, right? So it’s very hard to see the forest through the trees. You know this expression, right? Or the label- Yeah … of the bottle when you’re inside, ’cause you just, you know it so deeply. So you need to step out, and that’s why someone like a copywriter or content strategist is handy, because you’re so deep in your topic that you just write content and you’re like, “Everyone knows what I mean. They understand why it’s so important. They’re gonna get it. It’s awesome.” But really they’re, like, way back here on step one, and you’re on step five, right? So it’s so important that we get to a point where we can talk to someone where they’re at, right? And bring them along this kind of journey. So yeah- … that’s super key. I’ve heard it being called the expert gap, because when you’re- … an expert, you assume they know things that they don’t know, because they’re not- Yeah … speaking your language. Yeah. I love that, because really when a person is usually, I’ll give an example. A person is usually healthy, and then suddenly they have to go to the doctor, and the doctor starts throwing all these things at them, and they’re like, “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” right? They have to start doing the research. They have to start learning about things. They don’t know what the expert knows. So I love that you brought this up. There is- … a real gap that we need to fill, and I think the best word, the best way to fill it is with words, with explanations, with the exact things that they need to hear in order to feel like they understand what’s going on. Absolutely. Yes. So give me an example of that in copywriting. Yeah. So what I teach on is a framework. And then later people can get this little checklist that we’ll link to, but it’s like you need to do like, a audience readiness check. So what you can do is look at your page. This is what I do too as a copywriter. So I think of the audience, and one way to look at it is to think, “Okay, so where… Who am I talking to?” and of course we love to say, “Oh, I’m talking to everybody and anybody. Just anyone in the world is ready for this,” right? So that’s the first thing, is that we wanna really narrow it down. And you don’t have to pick one person and give her a name and say what kind of coffee she drinks, but you do kinda need to think about where she’s at, right? So what we do as a copywriter is we say, “Okay, who is this person that I’m trying to help?” ‘Cause we’re helping people. Selling is helping, so remember that, right? If we can’t sell someone and get them to convert, then we’re not helping them. They’re stuck in their problem. So unless we talk to them where they can understand the problem they’re having is real and bring them along towards the solution, we won’t be able to help them. So first I just wanna say that, ’cause I know some people think, “Oh, selling and conversion and sales, copywriting,” but it’s actually helping. Of course there’s slimy, scammy people, but actually writing powerful words to help someone get to the point to get the help they need is also very powerful and very important, right? So if you wanna help people, you need to help them along. So yeah. So what we would do is, like, where are they at? What’s the problem they’re having? And we don’t say “Oh I’m a hormo hormonal balance coach, so they have hormonal imbalance, so I’m gonna start talking about hormonal imbalance.” But they don’t know. Maybe they’re back there and they’re just like, “I’m tired,” “I’m so tired.” So we can’t tell them, “Hey, you need hormonal balance coaching.” You need to say, “I know you’re tired,” right? “Are you tired and you feel like you have an endless to-do list?” So we go deep down. I don’t know if you know the seven whys, that kind of exercise. So where someone’s yeah, like, why are you… Like, why this, why that, and why that? You keep going deeper. And we kind of need to find a way to coach them in our copywriting. So this is what I would do when I work with a client, is like, what’s your offer? What are the pains, the problems, right? And where do we shine a light to say to them, “Hey, it’s okay. You’re not alone. There’s a lot of women who are your age who are tired,” right? They have families, they have a husband, they have, they have stuff to do. So we talk them through that and we, we shine a light on that, and then we go through, and in a sales page or a landing page for your freebie sign-up, you kinda have to walk them through a journey, right? And they’re… Everything they’re reading is taking them through, and they’re recognizing themself. And they’re saying, “Okay, yeah, actually, yeah, so that is my problem.” And then, “Oh, what are the solutions?” And then they might be thinking, “Oh, I already tried that,” “I already tried something,” so they don’t believe it. So now you have to show why what you offer could work for them, right? And then of course you do talk about your program, but you wanna talk about benefits rather than the features, right? This many sessions, this many emails. So really what we do as copywriters is go into those deep benefits, and that’s the kind of thing that I would do, and I would urge people to look at their content. Any post that you write, you can be speaking to someone’s… to raise their awareness, their belief in the solution and themselves. They need to trust you, and they need to have the timing there. I know people don’t like urgency, and we can go into these deeper if you want, but you need to give them an idea that now is the moment, not later, right? ‘Cause everyone’s like, “I’ll come back to this later. I’m busy. I’ll buy this later. I don’t need the coaching now. I’m so busy,” but as we know I’m a certified coach as well we need to coach people to realize that this compounds. If you don’t get the help now, things get worse, yeah, right? I think that’s one thing that I am a little bit different in. Yeah. I believe that yes, things compound, and that, if you don’t do it now, you’ll probably be annoyed and sorry. Yeah. But I also tell all of my clients and all even my potential clients and everybody I’ll tell you guys right now, there’s a right time for you- to work with me, and I believe that it is… it’s okay if you don’t jump in right now. A lot of you people listening are like, “One day I’m gonna work with her.” Yeah. “But not right now,” because, whatever, all the reasons. And the reasons are legit- … and I trust that there is, there… You’re gonna, you’re gonna get there. It’s okay. So I’ve been very consistently telling people “I’m here for you. When you’re ready, come on in. There’s, free discovery call. We’ll figure it out. We’ll know what we need to do. We’ll work on it.” And I even had people who had a discovery call and then came back a year later and had another discovery call, and they just can’t get off the fence. They’re having a hard time committing to themselves and really wanting it. And I’m not pushy. I’ll tell you why, because I think that sometimes there really is this feeling that like if you push yourself into it and you go into it really ready and wanting, you’re gonna get so much out of it- … because you’re ready. You’re open. And if I push you into it, I can get you there, but I don’t know. So I agree with you that urgency works. But I’m also a little bit, like- I don’t know. I think it’s very personal to me. I really believe in there’s a right time for everything, and I am not giving up on you. I’ll be right here when you need me. Yeah, I love that. Exactly. And that’s the kind of thing, is that this kind of pillar of timing is you can do it in your own way, exactly. I, I am like, anti-hustle, anti-pushy. I don’t think that you should have to do that. So if you’ve warmed people up and you’ve shown them in the right way what you offer and how it can help, they’ll know when the right time is, right? But I do think it’s important to talk a little bit about when it is the right time, and someone will know. You can show them. “This could be the right time for you if X, Y, Z.” and they’ll know the right timing, but even talking about timing is helpful for people, right? To know. You don’t have to say, “Now is the time.” it clo- the door is closed. I can’t stand that kind of thing, right? Yeah. “The doors are closing,” and you’re like I don’t know. I think that the…” You know what I mean? Like, so definitely fake urgency is not the thing, but helping people, and depending on what kind of offer it is, helping people to say, and also offering… Time-sensitive things are important. You need to say “This package…” You know what I mean? You can say, “We have a group program, and jump in now. If not, another one starts later. Don’t worry.” this kind of thing- … is important, right? Yeah. “If now is right for you, we’re gonna do this together next week. If not, jump in because I’m doing it again in three months.” So this kind of thing is key. I love that you said that. Yeah. Like, you know, If somebody said that to me, I’m like, great.” So I’ll put it into my calendar, and I’ll remember that like, I wanna do that then. There was also something, I can’t remember the exact details now, but something that I really committed to do the next round, and I did. Yeah. And I was so happy I did. Exactly, yeah. Yeah. So you don’t have to be like, “Hey, now is the day.” ‘Cause I think it’s too bad, because marketing and copywriting and even posting online, it gets, sometimes gets a bad reputation, ’cause we see these big players using scare tactics and fake urgency and stuff like that. And then we don’t trust, right? We don’t trust people. So we have to make sure we’re building that trust and that belief in themselves. Yes. And it’s just if we’re coaches and if we have businesses where we help people and support them, we need to make sure we’re doing that in our content too, right? Yes. And without that knowledge gap kind of creating a filter. Oh, I love this. I love that we’re talking about this. Yeah. Let’s get practical. What type of words trigger certain things in our minds when we hear them or, different words for different things? I know one example that comes up to me right away is and. It’s not or, it’s and. Yeah. It feels like everything is doable and possible. Yeah, for sure. I love that. Yeah, and. And I think that… So for me words that trigger certain things. So I think we need to think about words, for example, what are you trying to convey at that moment, right? So again, I’m bringing it back to my expertise, which is yeah, copywriting content, and the audience, right? Who am I talking to? Who is this person? And give the example we have with our partners, for example. It’s like we say okay, I want them to say that, but they’re not saying it. So we have to think of the level of awareness they have, right? What are they thinking? Okay, so they’re not, a bad person. They just aren’t using the words I need to hear. So what we would do is be like, what is their level of awareness? So I would think of like, like I am is a very important set of words when you’re thinking about an audience or someone you’re talking to. So they might say “I am tired,” or “I am always behind.” what are they thinking? What are the things keeping them up at night? And then, you know- Yeah, I love the example that you gave of the horm- Yeah … the hormonal coach versus- Yeah … the I’m so tired because, we have a whole, we have a whole season like a whole uh, group of episodes all around hormones and- menopause, pre-menopause. Yeah, the whole thing. We’re, like, so excited ’cause there are so many experts I wanna bring on that all talk about this, and each one has their own twist. But anyway, I think it was such a great example because when we’re talking about the gap between where somebody is and what they’re trying to sell them- The expert knows that this is what’s going to help them, but the person- isn’t there yet. So let’s talk about that as an example of the audience. It’s an easy example to use. Yeah, exactly. So if the audience… If you’re selling your hormonal coaching package, that’s probably not the way they would call it, but right? They would hopefully have a better title than that, right? Balance your hormones in, in 30 days or something like this, whatever, right? You would think about, yeah you really need to get into the head of the other person, right? This is empathy, and if you are a coach or a nutritionist or like, someone who wants to really help women, we need to really step outside ourself and get in their head. What are their words, right? Not my words, not me. I know that this is the problem, and when you take this, and when you do this and that y- everything’s out of whack, and the science of it. We need to say like, into that person’s mind, they might say, “Yeah, I’m tired. I don’t feel like myself,” and I am is a big one, right? I am this, I am that, and I’m not myself. I’m changing. And then what we can do is we need to empathize with this person, right? How do we bring them along this journey? Like, how do we help them see that first of all being tired is not your fault, right? So a lot of people think, for example “Oh, I’m so disorganized,” “It’s my fault,” “I just don’t…” But maybe they have ADHD. Another one I use exam- examples of an ADHD coach, for example, who helps you get organized, let’s say. So you might think, “It’s my fault,” and “I can’t do it.” And then you’re not understanding that it’s just the wiring of your- of how your brain works. It’s different than someone else. You can’t just open up the Monday app or something and get it all sorted out. You work differently. Or you’re tired, but it’s not your fault. It’s not because you’re… So you have to help them understand what it is and then empathize with them, right? And this is so key with any kind of work. So how- what are the words we use to empathize with them, right? “It’s normal,” and “You’re not alone.” these are literal phrases you could wor- use in content or on your sales page. And then after that, we want to build the belief. So belief is important ’cause people think, “It’s not gonna work for me. I’ve already tried stuff like that.” it’s not… So what makes them… What’s gonna help them believe that this solution can help them, right? So you would do things like you would look at maybe just addressing past failures they’re- they’ve had. So you should speak the way they speak. So this is very marketing talk now. You would actually use their words, right? You wouldn’t say, “Oh,” “Hormone imbalance is gonna help you this or that.” You could say ” if you’ve tried this and you failed, it’s normal.” it’s… It doesn’t mean that you can’t fix it, right? So we need to build that belief in your solution and also themselves, right? It’s okay to have tried different things. And then we need to make sure we’re building the trust too, right? Trust in themselves and trust in us. So that’s the other key piece, is that when you go back to looking at yourself, you need to make sure that you’re showing examples of how you’ve helped people. So those are good things too. What are the actual words your clients have used about your coaching? Use those words, right? Do you use testimonials in your marketing stuff at all? I do. I’m curious. And recently I had this, um- when people listen to this, who knows what’s going to happen? But right now, as we speak, the war ended, and after the war ended, I was like all I wanna do is just hang out with my friends. I wanna invite everybody for a 20-minute chat just to catch up and see how everybody’s doing.” Nice. So I sent this email out to all of my list “If you wanna just chat, get on my calendar.” And I had back-to-back meetings with all of these amazing people I love so much. Aw. I got to meet new people, but I also got to speak to old clients, and I got to, really just chat with friends. It was amazing. And one of the cool things that came out of it was that people I haven’t worked with for two years, ’cause last time I worked with them was two years ago, told me that they’re still getting the results. One of the ladies doubled her capacity for more work even though- Wow … she has six kids even though she was, like, all over the place. She was so unorganized. She wasn’t able to get her act together. And we worked together. She was able to work twice as much and still have everything she needed to have in order. Her family life, everything fell into place. It was so fun to watch. But anyway, fine, after you work with me three months, you feel complete. I’m happy that you got the results, and then we don’t really get to catch up. So suddenly to see her and her tell me that she’s still making double the amount of money that she was, and she has the capacity still, and she hasn’t lost it, that was the best testimonial. I wish I was recording it. I was like, “What?” It was The best. That’s so amazing. Exactly, so that kind of thing. Because, yeah, and that’s so hard for you to think of it that way, right? Isn’t it funny how you know that your work impacts people long-term? It, and then it has ripple effects of course, right? You might have helped them with their relationship, but as we know, it goes into everything. Everything feeds into everything. Yeah. And so you helped her with that, and, you helped her in a certain amount of time, and then it still goes on and on, and she’ll probably use it in different aspects of her life. But yeah, you need… Just even taking down what she said, her exact words, would be perfect. You can paraphrase what she said, and always say, “Hey, do you mind if I put…” it doesn’t have to be her exact words. There’s ways to do testimonials, like summaries of what people said. You get them to sign off on it, and then she might even write you up a few more lines, ’cause that’s amazing. Yeah. Because we don’t wanna use our own words too much. It’s so tempting, and that’s why people pay other people sometimes because, when they can, because you’re you’re just in it. You know it, but you just can’t get those words out, right? So- Oh, yeah … but it’s also a good practice for you to do too, is to be like, “Okay,” “I’m gonna take notes from all those calls.” But I love that you did that. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I took notes. And it was such- Good … a boost of energy. First of all, for me, it was so- Yeah … important to just be human with my friends and with my, my people. It filled me up. It really was an amazing experience. And also, I feel like getting that feedback over and over again, it wasn’t just one time. It just kept coming up. Anybody who had worked with me in the past who showed up to a chat told me how amazing things are, and how things are totally different than when we first met and how it just stuck, and it never went back. And those are the things I tell all of my clients. Once you work on something, you can never unsee it. You can never- Yeah … switch back to not believing or not, having… It’s, that’s it. You’ve created it in your life. Yeah. So it’s very powerful. I love that you’re saying that, because a lot of people forget that testimonials are so important. And one more thing. I want you to really tell people what it is like to work with a copywriter, because I am going to also add from my own experience that it was one of the most- impactful things. Just like for me to sharpen my own messages, to have someone who I had to explain it to in such detail. Yeah. Exactly, yeah. Yeah, it’s a huge impact. It’s so much more, like you said, you can explain after if you want, than just like writing… Let me just rewrite your sales page. So yeah, exactly, the first thing we do is like we get on a call and you tell me what you do, right? And I have a set of questions, and a lot of times people are like, “Oh, And one of the most basic things is like, how would you explain this to like a 10-year-old? And people are just like, “It’s so hard to not use big words and to like…” like I was working with one girl who was like a very, like it’s very spiritual, like inner child work, energy healing, very, like very woo. Amazing woman, like amazing work. But it was so hard for her to explain the tangible benefits. People don’t wanna hear “Oh, like you’ll be your highest self after this,” right? “You’re gonna accomplish all your goals. You’ll be so happy.” Even that is not tangible enough, right? It’s okay, sounds good, but yeah, you gotta see your day-to-day life. Like you said, her business is she’s handling double the business. That is so tangible. This is the kinda thing you have to lead with, right? And people are like, “What?” You gotta catch their attention, and then you can kinda go down the path and explain it, why and how it’s all connected. But if you don’t catch someone’s attention, unfortunately they’re like onto the next thing, right? So yeah, I would sit down and talk to you, and we would come up with, like you probably did with your copywriter, is tell me everything, right? So I ask all the right questions, and then we look at your offer, and then we go through and we just find out Like, how would someone explain this? What would they complain about to their spouse at the kitchen table after dinner? What are the words they would say? So I would get them to say that, and then I would also come up with it too. And it it helps with obviously your deep core messaging, which many people think is not a big deal, but if you don’t have a very good message nailed down it affects everything. Your content, the way you talk to people at a networking event, like how you do discovery calls, like what your freebie says, what it helps them with. It leads into every single thing, and the offer you have too, right? Like, how are you positioning that? It’s just coaching, and we just talk all… We do these sessions, but you have to break it down to be so tangible, and it’s honestly a very hard thing for people to do. You can use AI to help you these days, which is great, but really a conversation like we’re doing now is the best way to uncover these deep things. And then yeah, and then once you have all that uncovered and I write loose frameworks of a page or an offer, or some posts, maybe a series of emails after someone gets your lead magnet, what are you gonna say to this person? The most important emails ever. After they’ve signed up you’ve, this is the key moment, right? So all of that structure is super important, and if it’s not thought out, it’s just you lose people that you could be helping. So yeah, I think a copywriter is someone who helps you really uncover those deep messages and benefits that we have to share all over the place. You work with them after a time period. Now you’ve got it, just like your coaching. You take it everywhere you go, and you’re like at an aha moment almost. Is that what you felt, or…?   Hey, before we continue the episode, I want to ask you something. Are you ready to get answers from G-d directly? Feel more in love with your husband and more supported than ever? Run the business of your dreams without having to sacrifice any other part of your life? That is exactly what my one-on-one private coaching is for, and I want to invite you, just you and me, for a free deep dive discovery call. This is a 60-minute free call where I ask you lots of questions, and we extract the three main things that are holding you back. I then put together a personalized plan for you where I create a roadmap of recommendations with practical steps. The call is free and so valuable in itself, so go book yours today. Now, back to the show  Oh, totally. So I think the first thing is, like you said, talking it through. Yeah. So I had this whole interview, and I felt man, she’s pushing me, and I don’t know. She asked me, “How would people describe the session itself?” And I was like I don’t know. It’s Yeah … something that’s not worldly. It is so hard for me because, the way I experience a session is I’m very present, and I feel like I’m receiving and like … being guided. So I can’t really know where we’re going, or I’m, like, not in control, but I see that it’s working. So I’m like, I’m guiding someone through, let’s say, a guided meditation, and they have these answers coming up for them. And then when she comes out of the guided meditation, I ask her certain questions, and then she tells me what she saw or what came up for her, and then we’re able to really break it down and figure it out. But like, for the most part Yeah … People’s reaction is, “Whoa. Wow.” “Whoa. I can’t believe it,” or things like that. What would she say that we actually do? I don’t know. Like- … magic? Like, It’s very strange. It took me a really long time to be able to say, “We do guided meditation that really, calms down the nervous system and allows you to bypass the brain to get real answers from your soul.” And that blew my mind because I can’t say that. That’s freaky, you know? yeah. What are people gonna think? But recently I ran one of my, I have this like, a small offer called Decide with Calm, which is basically make, how to make decisions. I teach them how to make decisions based on the CALM method. That’s the m- the method I created. Nice. And it’s very intuitive. Once you know it, you start using it everywhere, and decisions start getting much easier to make And once every quarter I have a live session where people come with their actual questions or decisions that they have to make, and we do it together. But, each person’s doing it on their own journal. But I actually- Yeah … sit them down and like, “Okay, right now you’re working on this decision.” And the reaction that people said was, “I came in here all flustered. I don’t know what to do. It doesn’t look like it’s gonna work out. I can’t decide. Either way I’m losing. Either way somebody loses. Either way something happens,” right? Like, all these decisions that are big and, scary and impactful, there’s a reason why they’re so hard to make. And coming to this Decide with Calm workshop, it… I’m like, “I’m shocked.” That’s what they’re saying. “I’m shocked that I’m feeling so congruent and so, like, at peace, and I feel like I really know what to do now and okay,” and it’s like, wow, things like that. It, and the funny thing is that it shocks me every time. It shocks me every time. I know to expect it. I know it’s working. But when I see their reaction, when I see their face and I see that ” Wow,” I get excited. That is what I live for. That’s powerful. Yeah, exactly. That was one of the hardest things the copyright asked me, I think. Where if you’re asking- Yeah … from all of the, okay, so what do you do and who do you help? I know who I help. I help women who are, extri- extraordinary. They’re pulled by big things. They want- … they wanna show up. They’re not like, they’re not just something. “Oh, I’m just a mother. Oh, I’m just a wife. Oh, I’m just a, homemaker.” obviously you’re not just, and I don’t believe in such a thing. If you’re a mother- … you’re a mother, and that is a full-time job, and I love you, and I appreciate you, and I- … Mm-hmm … like, Jealous of you completely. But like, there’s always this thing, like you were saying, ADHD people they think differently. So, like, My women have this fire inside that’s pulling them to do all these cool things. “Oh, I have to do this thing, and I have to help these people, and I…” and so those are my people the ones that have a family and also want more things to, to focus on. Exactly. Just chatting it through even now, like with me and you, like it’s so helpful, right? To be forced to explain the session. It’s so funny ’cause it reminded me of the session with the, with this healer, ’cause she did a… She does a similar thing. A little bit differently, but same thing. She’s like, “Oh, no. I don’t know. We just… I… Something takes over me, and I have a way to guide them, and I know what works, so that’s what it is.” And I’m like, “Okay. We cannot put that on your workshop invite.” people will say, Some people will get it, right? You can go focus on a very spiritually aware audience, but if you wanna speak to people where, who are, like you said, are powerful women who feel like they have more, who wanna give, who have all these things but have the, then that’s… They need a little guidance, right? Yeah. Then that’s the kind of person you wanna speak to. But my specialty, I have… You know how you’re saying I can help- Yeah … anybody with anything? So I was forced to really niche down. Mainly because I came from the graphic design world, and I was- Ooh I, yeah, I was a graphic designer for 15 years before I became a coach. Awesome. So for 15 years, I’m telling people to niche down. I’m telling them “I know you can do everything, but tell me what your favorite thing to do is.” Yeah. “And let’s do br- let’s do a design for that.” And there was this facial lady who she could do nails, and she could do this, she could do that, but she loves doing facials. And I told her, “Just focus on that.” That’s your thing. “Focus on that and tell everybody that is your thing, and this is how you do it, and this is your specialty.” She made so much money, and people still came to her for the nails and the other stuff because of course they need everything. Yep. But they came to her from that. Anyway, so I really believe in niching down, and when I coach… I became a coach, and I was like, “I can help anybody with anything.” And then I was like, “Okay, so I’ll focus on married women,” because I think if you change your marriage, you can change everything. Everything changes when your marriage is good, right? It’s like the opposite- Yeah … is so true. When your marriage isn’t working and everything’s sorta… Then everything’s not working. Nothing’s working. Yeah. Yeah. It’s so when you fix the marriage, everything just falls into place. And then within marriage, I felt like I don’t really just wanna be a marriage coach, ’cause I feel like there’s a lot of marriage coaches, and there’s a lot of different s- things out there. My specialty is when the marriage starts to butt heads with your business, with the thing- … that you’re doing. So it’s like you’re a woman in business. You have a job. You decided to start helping people. You’re either a coach, or you’re, an architect, or you’re a doctor, or you’re a lawyer or whatever. You have this thing that’s pulling you, and you’re doing. And then your husband doesn’t get it, or he doesn’t feel… It doesn’t feel like he’s supporting you as much, or he starts asking questions that make you feel like he doesn’t… Second-guessing you. Things like that. They can really shake up your world. Because it’s not so much just a marriage issue, it’s also the business issue. It’s like- … how do I continue growing my business when I feel like my husband’s jealous? Or how do I continue making more money if I feel like it’s taking a toll on my marriage? And those are the things that really light me up. So I love that you said find a niche and really niche down as much as you can. I feel like that helped me find the words. Just like I did now is a great example of the details of what it looks like when your business and your marriage are, pulling you in different directions. And then my specialty is how to bring them back and really, create- That’s amazing. Yeah. You’re… That’s like a sub-niche. That’s so amazing. ‘Cause some people would just stop at marriage, right? It’s “Okay, I’m a marriage coach,” which is great too, but you went even further and it’s like marriage and business. And even it’s like a certain kind of woman too, because… And every woman is amazing, of course, right? But if someone’s more ambitious and a little more of a seeker, then that’s the one who’s conflicted, right? She’s does my husband think that my, me working on the business is taking away from me taking care of children?” Or do you know what I mean? Like- And of course it does. Yeah, exactly. That’s the whole joke is, like, what do you actually- Yeah … think, and so it’s not so much about, addressing his questions. It’s more like- how for real are you about the things you choose that you’re able to communicate properly? And that brings us back to the words, right? Yeah. If you’re doing something and you can communicate why it matters, then it’s not shakable. Yeah. But if you’re, like, iffy about it, then it starts to shake you up. Yeah. And that’s really, it’s so powerful. But working- I was gonna actually say that, yeah. And that’s one other piece is yeah, the words you use within yourself too, right? You’re knowing those words, feeling them deeply. ‘Cause we all know we get imposter syndrome. We’re like, “Is this good or not?” But, if you know it is and you feel them deeply, it comes out, right? It comes across. Let’s be honest, if someone’s kinda shaky on what they offer and they’re not really sure if it helps or they don’t wanna be too pushy or too confident, it comes across. So yeah, you have to be confident in what you’re saying, right? And you know it works, so then say it, right? Say it like you wanna help someone, because you do. So that’s- Yeah … how you help people, ’cause they feel that, right? And then they can be confident in their own ability to get the help. So it’s crucial. Yeah. I also highly recommend getting a copywriter for that, yeah. Because a copywriter is an external person who pushes you to really stand for something, ooh, that’s amazing. Yeah. I found that once I was asked the seven whys, which by the way was one of the best- … Exercises ever. My why for why I do this is to bring God’s presence home. And- Ooh, I love it. That’s beautiful … I was shocked to find that and to actually get the courage to say it out loud. When I was starting out, I was freaked out from people even thinking that I am that much of a nerd. Oh my gosh, you’re- You’re funny … That’s what you care about? Like- I it was so scary for… I felt like I was walking around naked. I took off all the layers- … that were covering up to make me look human and normal- Yeah, and like- and like opening up- … cool … and telling everyone, “This is what actually matters to me, okay?” Here I am. And ah, it was so hard to say it out loud. And so I didn’t say it out loud, I just wrote it down. I have this little piece of paper in my room that says, “Bringing God’s presence home.” and I put it on my closet, on the inside of the closet so nobody could see it. You’re so cute. And I just started looking at it every single day, and like facing my real why. Love it. And it gives you so much confidence and so much clarity. Eventually, I was able to say it, and I was able to put it into words, and I was able to solidify it into a whole, my whole being. And now I’m, like, so confident. I’m like, “I don’t care. You guys can know my real stuff.” I have- This is what I said in the closet. Yeah. I have grown up so much since. But it’s amazing what eight years of working through these types of things, like what it could do to you as a person. I, like- Yeah … I highly recommend. But really, like you said, you could use AI. And I agree, you could. But- Yes. I’m gonna give you a big but One of my coaches said, “Come up with topics for your webinar without AI. I want 25.” and I was like, “No way.” What? “There’s no way I’m coming up with 25 topics.” That’s a lot. Not in a million years. But you start writing, and you realize, oh, I, I could come up with 40. Not 25. I could come up with many more. Okay. And the reason is that once you turn on your brain and you start running the faucet, more and more start to come. But if you crutch on AI, “Give me 25 topics.” aI is going to regurgitate the same thing over and over again based on what you told it superficially, but it’s not gonna get to the bottom of it because it doesn’t know what’s deeper because it’s not human. There is nothing deeper. Yeah. And so it, it can’t read your mind, and it can’t read your soul, and it can’t really know what is sitting there. Like we were saying, there’s layers, and then you s- you feel naked suddenly because somebody saw something in you that was so much deeper. That is not going to be found by AI. Yeah. And that’s why it is… Your job is not going away be- Thanks … because of the fact that you’re not just writing text. Yeah. You’re not just filling words. You are helping people get to the bottom of what actually matters to them, and then communicating in a way that other people can hear. Yeah. You nailed it. Yes, exactly. You do ne- It’s an uncovering, right? It’s like clearing off the soot and the ashes from your lantern. What’s really there? You say, “Oh, I know what I talk about. I know what I help with,” but it is very vulnerable, right? And being vulnerable is so powerful because people are attracted to that. And like you said, you find your deep why, the deep benefit. The core purpose, right? It’s so important. And then you don’t… Y- you just work out from there, and that’s your lighthouse. That’s what you’re… what’s always standing there, you come back to, ’cause we get distracted. More ash comes on the lantern, and we have to find a way back. And if you have that core, key purpose you can use it in everything, right? And so yeah, and also taking a stand like that and saying, “Okay, is this what I should say? I’m gonna tell people this is what it is.” I tho- You found it nerdy. It’s so cute, actually. It’s funny. But some people, you will repel people, right? And that’s the scary thing, too. It’s like, “No, I wanna be okay with everybody. I want everyone to just love whatever I do. I don’t wanna make anyone mad or something, or repel them.” But we have to, right? You’re gonna super attract people with this belief that feel it, they love it. They’re with you. They’re like, “Oh my God, I needed this.” And other people will be like, “Not for me.” And you know what? That’s awesome, ’cause you will have people who are… Maybe they’re not even married they’re coming to you. They were married. Maybe they’re looking for… Who knows, right? It’s like they just are attracted to you and that core purpose, and if you don’t uncover that, you’re just kinda like- putting random stuff out there, it doesn’t resonate, right? So yeah, I love how you’re describing what I do back to me. It’s beautiful. Yeah, it’s so powerful. It is. It’s… You know what’s amazing? I was just like sitting with what you said ’cause it’s so powerful. It’s so powerful. The words come from a deeper place, and when they do, they resonate and they attract the right people. And then you said about rejecting, the wrong people or pushing away the wrong people. I had this majorly when I was starting out because I obviously believe in God, and I am very in everybody’s face about it. My whole thing is bringing God’s presence home. I am, I’m a pretty- pretty in your face about God. And I thought, “How am I going to say that?” I get on a podcast… ‘Cause the truth is that all the podcasts I was following and listening to until that point, they were saying, “God,” or, “The universe,” or whoever you believe in. And it was like this go-to saying that everybody said. Mm. And over And over again, I heard it on all the podcasts, and it didn’t matter if the person saying it was Jewish or not, or if they- Yeah … were a believer or not, they, everybody was very like, respectful of everybody and everything. And I just felt like I needed to take a stand- Wow and be like, “In this podcast, we believe in God. And we’re not going-” “… to apologize for believing in God. We are going to believe in God, and bring God into everything we do.” And as soon as I did that, I shot up to the 20 top w- you know, podcasts- … or something or other. It was the craziest thing that happened. And it, it surprised me, because like, it, I thought it would throw me to you know- Yeah … “Oh my gosh, how could you?” Oh. But that fear of being, of being, I don’t know, not belonging, or being different, and whatever, that’s s- it’s the- Yeah … other side of the coin of actually succeeding and doing the thing you’re here to do. If my goal is to bring God’s presence home, then what? I’m gonna apologize for saying, “God”? Does that- Yeah … Does that even make sense? So by pushing the people who don’t believe in God away, and it’s not because I don’t love them and think that they’re, just as valuable, in this world. God created you, too. Yeah. But I still believe in God. Yeah. But… You know- So … God created all of us. Some believe and some don’t. It’s okay. I’m not gonna force you to, but I’m also not going to let you force me to not, or- Yeah … apologize for it. Like- Exactly … Such a key moment for me, when you were talking like, that is the example that came up for me when you were talking about repelling the wrong types. That was one of the biggest moments in my business, when I- … when I committed early on, I committed- That’s super powerful. Yeah, exactly. Because it differentiates you, right? And it is, it’s hard. But, and that’s why even being a business owner, I’m sure you always think about this and probably talk about it, but it’s such a journey. It’s a personal journey to start a business and talk about yourself and your work. And to uncover all this stuff, it’s a journey, and I love that kind of introspection. I’m sure you do, too. But- … not everybody’s up for that when they start their business. Even if you are an architect or a doctor you have to look deep within you to be your best you, and not everyone’s ready to do that work. But when you do, it’s amazing, right? And yeah, and it you, that’s your differentiator. That’s what makes you special. And like you’re putting out like a beacon signal with your words, those simple words about God’s presence in your life, and it just like it brought you up and all those people were like, “Yes, I wanted this,” right? Yeah. And it’s not even about repelling people, it’s just like bringing all those people to you who were looking for that. They couldn’t find it before, right? ‘Cause not a lot of people do that. So yeah. Yeah. It’s amazing. You set yourself apart. You know, when I niched down into marriage and business, I found myself completely alone in this new field. Yeah. I looked around and I was like- Yeah … “What? Nobody else talks about this? I, am I the- Yeah … am I the automatic expert?” Like- Yes … what just happened? And the truth is that’s what happens. When you niche down, you become the automatic expert because, nobody else is talking about this. People are talking a lot about work and children, right? Like mommy job- Yeah. Yeah, that’s true … and how to be a mom CEO and things like that. A lot. I’ve heard a lot about it. But like really those like real fights about your business with your husband and how he tells you’re wasting too much time or you’re not- Yeah making enough money or la-da-da, he gets into your like space a little bit. Yeah. Those are not being talked about, and that’s my specialty. It’s amazing. Yes, exactly, because you suddenly you open up to yeah, to like a new kind of person, right? And it’s not about closing yourself in, and that’s what everyone’s scared of. I don’t wanna put myself in a box. But it’s almost like an opening, right? It’s oh, you’re opening the door to these people who fit in this world, who there’s lots of people like that. Look how many people there are in the world, right? And so yeah. And then like you said, people always come anyway, even if they don’t have a business, even if they work- Always somewhere. They have a- Oh, yeah … high-pressure job, and the husband’s like, “Oh, you’re working late again?” And they’re like, this kind of thing. Like it’s not closing yourself off. It’s like taking that stand, putting your flag down and saying, “This is who I am and this is who I help,” right? And it just, people will resonate with that. They certainly will. So yeah, it’s amazing. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Is there anything else that comes up for you when we’re talking about words specifically? Or like way of speaking Yeah. I think that just, yeah using words that people can see themselves in too, right? Like I know I’ve talked about that a lot, but people need to understand why things matter and like where they fit in what you do, right? You just really… The words that you use need to bring them along and take them into account. Don’t just imagine yourself like speaking out into the void, and, “Here’s my thing, and we’ve chosen our stand. We know our niche,” and “I’m gonna announce everything.” And you have to be intentional, right? We need to be intentional about those words, and those are the kind of pillars that I help people if they want a framework is like looking at, “Am I talking to someone who doesn’t even know that’s the problem yet?” Some people don’t even know they have a problem. They’re just like, “I’m frazzled. I’m all over the place. That’s who I am. I guess that’s what life is,” right? So be intentional. Yeah. Talk to people at different stages, right? So look at, think about it. Take a minute and write out like a journey. That person doesn’t even know what’s going on. They’re just, their life is chaos. This person knows there’s a problem. They’re looking for a solution. This person knows that coaching is a solution, and they’re looking into coaching, so what am I gonna say to them, right? This person is like looking at me. They found me. They trust me. They’ve been watching my podcast. They’re here and there. What are the things that maybe they need to hear? What are the trust builders? What are those things? So the last thing I wanna say about that is like just bring people on the journey, and use different content pieces pieces of your conversation. When you see who you’re talking to on a call, switch to what you say, right? Switch what you’re saying. Just say, “Okay, this person is like they don’t know what’s going on. They don’t even know there’s a solution,” right? Yeah. So what do they need to hear? What do they need to hear to feel like they can do this and this is something for them? So yeah, being intentional, and content, conversations, copy. Just take a minute and think it through, and it really will help you out. I love it. I love it. Don’t talk at people. Yeah. Talk to people. It’s such a big difference, but really- Yeah … It’s a total change. It’s a total game changer. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. I love it. Thank you so much. How can people find you? How can they work with you? Yeah. You’re just a real, you’re a really cool copywriter. I really enjoyed meeting you the first time we met, and then now again. I feel like there’s something really genuine about the work that you do, and you have a real system, like a way to take somebody from here to there, like even within the process of working with a copywriter, but also, within their own journey. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that’s the thing. I think it helped that I started off as a coach. I was coaching and I got certified, right? And then I’m like, “Okay, now what’s happening?” And now I’m in the more marketing scene, and it’s a… And I keep thinking coach in your copywriting, coach in your content, right? Do some light coaching, have conversations. It’s all about conversations, right? Yeah. But yeah. So people can find me through my website, and probably you’ll link it. It’s www.rebeccaflorence.com. And right now, it’s like a one-page website. I have something there which will help you with sales pages. So I like to have people look at their current sales copy and just look at it in a new perspective from what I talk about. And they can also grab my free lead magnet, which will go in deeper into what I was talking about, the audience readiness. The awareness, the belief, the timing, the trust. They can look at their copy and their content and do a checklist, and see if they’re missing some of those gaps. And then I give a few tips in there too about how they can overcome those gaps in their copy. So yeah, grab my lead magnet, get on my email list. I share lots of tips like this. And send me a message. Just send me a DM. I love talking to people. I love jumping on calls like this. So I’m here if you wanna just chat through things, no problem. Yeah. I love it. Thank you. Thank you so much, guys, for listening, and don’t forget to come back next week for Words and You, which is a really cool episode, how you can use the words, to your advantage and really, yeah. I’m not gonna give you any spoilers. Yeah. You have to come back next week. I’m gonna come listen. Thanks so much, and don’t forget to be connected for real.  And that’s it! Thank you for listening to the very end. I would love if you can leave a review and subscribe to the podcast. Those are things that tell the algorithm this is a good podcast and make sure to suggest it to others. Wouldn’t it be amazing if more people became more connected for real? And now take a moment and think of someone who might benefit from this episode. Can you share it with them? I am Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman from connectedforreal. com. Thank you so much for listening and don’t forget you can be connected for real.