40. Behind the Scenes with my husband, Rabbi Avi Grossman

April 20, 2022

In This Episode

My husband, Rabbi Avi Grossman, founder of Torah Le’Maaseh and author of Haggadat Hapesach – The only Passover Haggadah for a Seder with the Paschal offering as the centerpiece, is here with me to discuss working together as a couple on this joint project! Listen to how we work together, who does what, and how we juggled our strengths and weaknesses to create an epic, one-of-a-kind Haggadah.

Links

Order Haggadat Hapesach here!

Rabbi Avi Grossman: Website

Machon Shilo YouTube

TorahBox YouTube

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REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Welcome to the Connected For Real Podcast! I’m Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman, a marriage coach for women in business, and my mission is to bring God’s presence into your life, into your marriage, and into your business. Let’s get started. The following is one of the many conversations I had with experts and professionals about real life and how it affects marriage. Let me know your takeaways on Instagram or Facebook, @connectedforreal. Enjoy.

And we are live. Welcome everyone to the Connected for Real Podcast. I am Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman and today is super awesome because I have a very special guest. So, let me give you some background information. Season three is all about women who are working together with their husbands on the same business and as I was interviewing women who are working together on the same business with their husbands, I felt the need to also bring you into my life and show you a little bit of behind the scenes with my husband and how things are and it’s actually really exciting and also a little bit scary and all the things. Of course, with all the tech issues that we’re having, my husband’s still trying to log on so we’re waiting for him but meanwhile, I’m going to tell you a little bit of the background story. So, as I was transitioning—oh, there he is. Maybe he will actually be able to join us right now. Let’s see.

Hello Rabbi Avi Grossman. Welcome to the show.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Hi! Who are you?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

[Laughs] That’s great. Good beginning. Okay, so please tell our listeners what you do and all the great stuff.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I’d be happy to but I did not hear your request. All I heard was, “Please tell our listeners something something because I’m not sure—can hear you even right now. I don’t know if you’re listening to me. You’re froze about twenty seconds ago. Well, I could sort of hear you so I don’t know what you want from me.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Oh, no! Tech problems. You know, we live in the same house.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Let’s see what the problem—what I’d like to see the recording of this afterwards and see what the StreamYard was actually recording because from my end, I look fine. Thank God and my audio is fine. The video is fine but you’re basically audio and video are stuck like anything. So, it’d be very interesting to see where the problem actually was.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

That’s terrible. Let’s find out from our listeners. Who do you see more clearly and hear more clearly? Because I have a feeling this is a problem with where you are and not where I am. So guys, everybody, sign up for me. Give us some votes. Tell us I’m the winner. Comments are coming in.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Do I see? I don’t see anything coming in but apparently I’m not the webmaster.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

No, Beth says, “We see you both fine,” so let’s keep going because apparently it’s working. Okay—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay, so if it is working now, what it is you asked me?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes, introduce yourself.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Hi. I’m Avi. I’m the Rebbetzin’s husband. I like to study. I have children, which you probably heard about if my wife has discussed them. I have a wife who probably has introduced herself to you many times and what was sense am I supposed to introduce myself? You could check out my YouTube channel or my YouTube videos and the things I write. We’re going to be having to talk about something special I wrote—put a lot of work into but you haven’t introduced the Haggadat yet, so I guess we’re gonna have to talk about this, right?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, we are going to talk about the Haggadat because that is the project that we both worked very, very closely on, and I want—season three is all about couples working together the strengths the weaknesses and how we dealt with all of the challenges, so I want to let the wonderful listeners know how it is that we got to this amazing product, which he’s—the Rabbi’s holding the Hebrew edition. I have the English one in my hand. So, this is actually super exciting because—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I said I put it down so I wasn’t holding it.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Okay, you showed it before. It was the Hebrew one and I’m showing the English one, and I think that’s pretty cool because three years ago, we published the Hebrew one, which is the first one that came out and now we’re ready. It just feels like a fuller story because not only did we have the Hebrew one and we printed and published and did everything ourselves and got it into bookstores, but we also translated it and have it now in the English edition, which is super cool. I feel like is a real big accomplishment.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay, I think you said something about the Haggadat.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

[Laughter] I think that you should maybe come home and use the same internet as me or even be in the same room with me.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Oh, maybe yeah that’ll take me quite a few minutes.

I’ll just say yes. I worked on this because my wife pushed me to do it. I had the idea and I basically had the material for it but it only became a book because my wife told me, “Yeah, you just have to make it happen already put it all together and do it,” and it actually came together quite quickly. I didn’t realize that I have so much material already waiting to go, and she also did the design. It was actually published in January 2020, which was two months—two years and three months ago. The English edition came out about 11 months ago if I’m not mistaken. It’s already been in second printing but then again it’s still a limited run printing. I think that this is the most important book at least for the coming month. Why? Because we all observe Passover. We all have our Maxwell House or ArtScroll Haggadat sitting around in that closet and we’re all thinking, “Wow! Passover’s coming. I can’t wait to take out my Haggadat and use it this year just like I’ve done every year.” Normally, in Judaism we like to keep tradition. That, which we did last year, we’re going to do this year and that’s what we’re supposed to do this year and that’s we’re going to teach our kids and it’s so much fun that we do exactly as we always did except for the things we change but we try to stick to the tried and true text, do everything as great grandfather did, except this year things are meant to change and that’s why we need this because, if God willing you get the chance to sit at a table with Korban Pesah, off there—see, it says Pesach. Pesach is a type of sacrifice you have to know what to do and you’re old Haggadat, your ArtScroll or Maxwell House is not going to tell you the right thing.

If I’m speaking over you, I’m very sorry because you froze like about two minutes ago. So—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

You’re doing great. I was saying that it says on our Haggadat this year in Jerusalem as opposed to next year in Jerusalem because if you say next year in Jerusalem every year and you don’t actually mean it, then there is a problem. We’re praying for things to change. We are praying for a better reality and we need to do something about it. So, this is our step that we’ve taken to move forward and it’s been very exciting to actually see the rabbinical world. We have the chief Rabbi of Israel gave this letter and—oh, there he goes—and many other rabbis have given it their blessing. It’s super exciting because we always walk around thinking there’s nothing we can do.

Oh, there he is.

We walk around thinking There’s nothing I can do. I just have to continue living this default life while I have to pray for things to change, but in reality God wants us to try. He wants us to put our hand out even if it’s too far, even if it’s something that we think is unreachable, and as we do that, we can actually at least see movement, see some sort of success.

So, in the beginning this whole thing started because I asked the Rabbi What would you do if you had million dollars? and I think that if you go back maybe three years ago to my YouTube channel, you will see the million dollar question and how this all started. And, the Rabbi said, “I would write the Haggadat but I don’t have a sponsor,” and I said, “You’re waiting for someone to give you money so that you can write the Haggadat? Just do it,” and says, “Well, I don’t have a sponsor,” so I said, “I’ll sponsor it,” and that’s how the whole thing started.

I was telling my husband the whole time how he needs to do all these things—have a YouTube channel, start a podcast, give classes because he’s so creative and so amazing, and at the end the real transformation was when I started doing those things and I stopped pushing him and telling him what to do. He was finally free to do the things that he wanted to do, and very, very quickly like he said before things moved extremely, surprisingly fast, and he was done writing it, then he said, “Okay, what now?” and I designed it and then we went to print and in order to pay for the printing. We pre-sold the Haggadats and were able to cover almost all of the printing with all of the sponsors that helped out and they basically just bought the book ahead of time. That’s all they did but it was the best thing that they could have done because that created a new reality where this was actually doable and with that manuscript, before we went to printing, we went to all the rabbis and actually, I didn’t do so much of that my husband did it. Thank God I didn’t have to run around but my husband really went and got it in the hands of some big Rabbis and got some feedback, got some great advice about what to change, what to put, what’s here—here, there. It started the conversation, which was a really blessed conversation. It’s almost like a breath of fresh air for people who are in in this world for so long and have been praying so long and have been hoping for something to change, to see someone who’s actually excited about it, and actually discussing what will be and how will it change.

Now, if you look in the Haggadat itself, there’s purple text. The purple text is designed to show you that this is something that you’ve never said before. It’s something new and when you’re reading through this as preparation for Pesach or you’re during praise when you’re just really interested in what’s going to actually be, you will see that there’s a lot of change. Now, in the back we included a list of the Haggadat that you’re used to now and a list of the Haggadat of—yeah, the seder that will be or—please God, that we should marry to be there this year.

So, one of the biggest things is that right now, for the last years we’ve been using matzah as a placeholder for the pascal lamb or the offering or Korban Pesah. So, we’re supposed to have a piece of meat at the end of the meal and instead, because we don’t have that, we eat bread instead. Well, not bread. Matzah, but you know, instant bread. Now, that makes it that we have to have Yachatz which is you know cutting of the matzah towards the beginning of the meal and hiding one of the halves to become afikomen. Now, that’s not going to be there anymore. We’re not going to have that, so that changes but that’s not the only thing that changes. There’s a bunch of different things that move around and get sort of reshuffled or completely gone or are completely added that we’ve never done before because there’s suddenly an offering at the table. Now, you cannot eat the offering out of Jerusalem.

Yes, you can ask a question. Just one second.

You cannot eat the offering outside of Jerusalem. You have to sign up ahead of time and be part of a group. So, at the time of the slaughter of the offering, the priest has to have the group in mind and has to know who is going to be sitting around the table together and you can’t invite new people. So, what we’re used to in this you know in all the years that we’ve done until this point is inviting people off the street, even announcing it as part of the seder, and here you’re not going to be able to do that you actually have to sign up ahead of time. You also have to be ritually pure—I’m so good at my English words here. Woo!

You have to be ritually pure by going to mikvah beforehand and being prepared in order to eat this piece of meat. Now, people who are not able to be ritually pure will actually still be doing the Pesach seder like we used to do. Those are the only people who are going to be sort of allowed to do what we have been doing. Everyone else is going to be in Jerusalem. Say Amen! Everybody together. Let’s go. This year in Jerusalem and we’ll be using this text. All the other Haggadats that are being printed and published and in all the bookstores are all talking about something that is hopefully going to not be used anymore. We’re hoping that theirs will be the old-fashioned, outdated and that this will be the one that everybody is using. So, you’re going to need one of these.

Now, we have a question. It’s pretty long, so hang in there. Hi guys. Blessing to you both. Can I ask you guys a question? As born into the Christian Catholic faith, I’ve looked inward I have my own faith and the wrongs in it. I’ve also looked into all faiths and [the] wrong in them too. I hear that. Now, we all know there is a God. Yes, okay. I’m happy we all know there’s a God, and sometimes more divine. Do you guys reckon someone could ever write a book on all religions and their wrongs while highlighting their rights and goodness I do have Jewish ancestors and understand all faiths on another—oh, it’s cut. It’s cut off. It’s cut off. I can’t see the end. Anthony, thank you for your question.

My husband probably just walked in because I heard the door behind me, so hopefully he’ll come into the conversation and I’ll ask him what he thinks about it but I think that something that you said is really beautiful. We all agree there is a God and really, now that we are in the times of the redemption, the most important thing is to remember that basic, basic—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Who are you talking to?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I’m still live and we’re still having a conversation. Anthony asked a question and I was answering it.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay, can I join you?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Okay, the Rabbi is here. He will join us in a minute after he moves the little girl that’s sleeping in my bed right next to me.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

TMI.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes.

What was I saying? That right now in the time of redemption we have to realize that the common denominator is God and everyone agrees that we are here to bring God’s light into the world and it doesn’t really matter so much where you find yourself in all of this big puzzle, but if everyone is doing their part and God is guiding you to your part by giving you your will and your will is going to pull you—if you really listen and quiet the noise, you’re going to hear very clearly what it is that you need to do in order to bring God’s light into your world and together, we sort of you know make it into the whole world. So, that is my short answer to your long question that got cut off because StreamYard isn’t letting me read the end but I will hopefully go back afterwards to Facebook and make sure to answer the question properly.

Let me know if that was a good answer. Beth, I’m wondering if you’re still here and if everything has been clear and if you have any questions and here you go.

Yay! Now, we’re in the same room. We have to make like a line. Maybe we should do like a line? Yeah, like as if we’re in different rooms.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Why?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

It’s just so fun.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Is this a Honeymooners episode?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Okay, so what’s my strength, what’s your strength and when working together on this book and how did we deal with the challenges?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

My strength and your strength when I’m working the book. Well, I knew my stuff and my strength is I knew my stuff and you.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I was your strength?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Yeah.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

That’s very nice.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

It was very good. Your strength is well, you’re good at designing it.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Thank you. I think it came out really nice.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

You didn’t contribute any of the words to the Haggadat, I think. Did you?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I did. I wrote the back. I wrote the back—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Oh, you wrote the back? So okay—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

And the end. Yeah, I did the back cover. I really—I did and I think I read through most of it. Oh, also wrote all the thank yous and stuff. Yeah, I did a lot.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Thank you.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I did like the all these—the intro pages. These. I did something.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I thought I did that. Okay, fine I guess you did it.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, but no, for sure your strength is the content and running around to the Rabbis to get their approval.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

No, I’ll explain to everybody. I basically took off from like working I guess for a livelihood in order to put this book together. My wife was the sponsor of this thing and like that, that’s what I mean by my strength. My wife asked me the million dollar question—did you describe that yet? Did I miss that part?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, I told them that in here.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Yeah, so that was the million dollar question as though I was given a blank check to do this. That blank check was signed by my wife so that’s how this was able to actually happen. So yeah, that’s a good thing.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Actually, it was signed by God.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

No, God doesn’t sign anything, even when God signs his name on the torah for example he has Moses write it for him and that’s his authorized thing. So, too—God has emissaries in this world. Yeah, we say we thank him for the bread. The farmer is the one who made the wheat and then there’s some other guy running that reaper machine and a few guys who grinded into flour, so you know the whole process of making just a loaf of bread but God has many emissaries in this world, so that’s what we think about that. Who do you praise right before you eat that bread? God. Yeah, so there so too. He has his those who work with but his main I guess his main agent in this process was my wife. See?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

That’s exciting. Yes, okay. So I’ll tell you about my weakness because I’m a workaholic and the second I started working on this thing, I went over time and his strength is making sure that I eat and I stop working.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

What you define as workaholism has a sort of a negative connotation. I don’t like that word but let’s work with it. Some people are workaholics. It’s a blessing and a curse. Yes, they work very hard. They have they stick to it but sometimes it’s hard to get them off of it sometimes. They have to, when it comes, time to stop.

I guess my strength is that I am not a workaholic. I’m always looking to get distracted.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I’m always looking for something else. It’s true. I’m not much more but also more focused on let’s say—I don’t know just the home economics and the children. I have to—I guess hyper aware almost like a helicopter parent. I don’t know.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

No. Not. No way.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Not like helicopter but I always try to be aware. “Well, no we have to stop working now because—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Cause the kids are coming.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

The kids are coming and laundry—all these house things that we put ourselves into. If we didn’t, if we had just like let’s say stayed at one child, perhaps we know we’d have a lot more time on our hands. Well this one is away now, so that yeah but we keep it.

We have younger children so that’s how it is.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, it’s really, really good that we’re so different. Does it make it easier? No, because I just feel like it’s not centered. Sorry, guys.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

It’s not centered. Well, yeah. Just shake it here.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

No, stop, stop. You had your back to the wall I was like, “Why am I working so hard? I could also have my back to the wall.” So, I’m really focused and I like getting things done and the Rabbi is very creative and prolific at writing and getting things like this done.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay, thanks.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

And I think that that works. Beth is laughing. I’m happy we make you laugh.

Okay, so what were the challenges of this book?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

What were the challenges of this book? Well, the only thing I guess was remotely challenging—I don’t think this was a challenge, by the way. It was just we stuck to it and we did it. There was two extraneous challenges, I think. The first was funding for the book, so eventually when it came time to print, we had to put up the money ourselves, which by the way, buy the book. You’re basically covering our costs. We didn’t find the publisher who had the I guess who shared my vision and my faith and my trust in God. Faith in God means you believe He exists. That’s very basic. A lot of people claim to have faith in God. Many people have trust in God and [Hebrew] wrote a whole book about trusting. There’s a whole, I guess a section of the [Hebrew] about trusting in God. How do you trust God? So, people don’t have the same trust.

I realized that all the publishers I approached—there’s still one publisher who’s still thinking about it but most of them rejected it. Why? They’re betting against Korban Pesah. Haggadats have been selling for centuries. Everybody who’s anybody—I remember Rabbi Khan in Q Gardens told me this. Anybody who’s anybody has put out his own Haggadat, and they’re all using the same basic text, except for those I guess the new age ones but whatever we don’t discuss those. Everybody’s basically using the same Haggadat for Pesach. The same ArtScroll the same Maxwell House one forever. They put different commentaries, different illustrations, different design. This is something new entirely that can only be used, God willing, when we have the Korban Pesah on the table as I described. So, they’re basically this would only become useful in their eyes if [Hebrew], the messiah, shows up. That’s the way they’re thinking, so they’re betting against it. Last year, there was no Korban Pesah. This year there’s not going to be a Korban Pesah. I don’t—I see most of the preparations for this coming Passover with regards to Haggadot, especially the hotels. I mean, look at them. Everybody is basically assuming and as they in Hebrew they say the assumption is their [Hebrew]. They’re building on this. They’re betting against the re-establishment of the temple and its service, which I don’t understand. People who trust in God—back to trust—people trust in God should have this thinking. If this is the Haggadat of people trust. Basically, if you’re Jewish if you actually put your money where your mouth is and you believe in that which you claim to believe, then you have this Haggadat because you need this here, and if your Judaism and relationship with God is a lip service, I guess a lot of couples it’s like that also just lip service. So, then you don’t buy this because you have your Maxwell house or your ArtScroll, and you’re going to go to that cool new place for Pesach. You’re going to go to Dubai. You’re going to head into Dubai with MBD and the rest of them. We’re going to take a cruise, go to Greece and Egypt. That’s great people go to—Greece for for Hanukkah, go to Egypt for Passover.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

That’s really going back to our roots.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Or they are going to feel or they’re going to be even at the best the fanciest hotel in Jerusalem, the King David Hotel, which is right across the old city. The King David hotel is not a hundred meters, if I could use meters. That’s about 300 feet—350 feet or so. The King David Hotel is just southwest of the area where you could eat your Korban Pesah.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Oh, that stinks.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Yeah, just—why you gotta do that? If you trust in God, you will have this Haggadat because you need it and that’s we’re doing.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I think of this Haggadat as like those people who buy the stroller before they get pregnant and like to show that they’re ready to almost take a step towards the goal.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

They believe it’s going to happen. Yeah, but you asked me what the challenge was. The challenge was finding like-minded people and because I found the outside publisher, we became the publisher. So, this is, thank God, the third thing we’ve published independently and there’s a fourth one on the way if the designer would finish doing it, you’d have the fourth book and the fifth book are on the way so we became publishers. That was the challenge.

The second one was finding rabbinic endorsements. Sometimes a Rabbi doesn’t have to, say endorse you, but at least if they sign their name to it saying, “I like this Haggadat. It’s quite nice,” and they allow me to print their name and their stationery their signature in the book, so that was that was good and to them I have I have profound gratitude.

The Rabbis who first—the first rough to get on board to actually also review the Haggadat, make changes to it, suggestions, he looked over very thoroughly as our master, our teacher, Rabbi Moshe Tzurial of Bnei Brak, who seems to be very excited about this and we have nothing but gratitude and also we pray for his good health. Check out his Facebook Page. He is quite active still. He’s put out quite a few books and it was thanks to him—he was the first major rabbinic figure to review the safer and basically a proof of it, so we thank him, and after that was the local rov, Rabbi [Hebrew], who—he hasn’t seen English one I don’t think he deals mostly in French and Hebrew but he was a kind—very kind to us to review it—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

He was very excited.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

He sent me to Rabbi Dov Lior, a senior rev around here, and eventually the Chief Rabbi himself. I was there and—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

That was exciting. Can I just tell you we talked about challenges—let’s talk about celebrations. When that letter came in, that was exciting.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I try not to take any political stance in this book even though I have my own politics. This isn’t for example taking a stance with the major issues which we talk about. For example, the Jewish ascension to the temple mount today—trying to stay neutral that. This is a Haggadat. It is merely a suggestion of how we are supposed to be keeping the seder. I welcome other scholars and I’ve actually seen some have a suggestion I’ve even argued with them about how this is supposed to be and of course, [Hebrew] there hasn’t seen the book now. I’m not exactly a follower of [Hebrew] but I did read his to vote, and around here he commands a lot of respect and just to show even people across the aisle so to speak we have there and I’m glad that that it’s been there and there’s even a few rubuna who have requested their own personal copies so the biggest challenges were the funding and finding basically the collaborators if you could call it that and now getting it out the challenge now is to get the word out.

Why do I need to get the word? I need to sell these Haggadot because they’re clogging up the house but also no, I’m [in] Israel. The Jewish people need these Haggadot. The righteous gentiles need these Haggadot. By righteous gentiles, I don’t mean people who are saving people from the holocaust. They’re holy ones. I mean, just non-Jews who are also excited about this, who want to understand what’s going on. They need to get this they need to get their hands on this also. Remember Judaism isn’t just for Jews and trying to get the message we’re trying to get this out there. That’s the biggest challenge we have and that’s why I also thank my wife because I think she has a bigger internet audience than I do. Do you?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I thought—so, here’s the thing. His blog gets more reads and my people I think are more visual-audio. Okay, so now that’s more—it’s different.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Machon Shilo. Go check them out on YouTube. They hosted a few of my videos. I saw I’ve got a few hundred views.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Hey, there you go.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

But then again, the one video I put on YouTube by myself years ago got a thousand something views, which is pretty impressive, I think.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I won’t tell you but my video has 50,000 views.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

The crayon video?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

About melting crayons.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

It’s about melting crayons, yes, and it’s so fun. You should go and look at that one.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Ironically—it’s so ironic. The things we really put our effort into, put your heart and soul and your life savings into a book—not life savings. You put your heart and soul into this book and so you get a YouTube video about it. A few hundred views. Melt a few crayons in your backyard you get wow, 50,000 views. The world is a crazy place. [Hebrew]. This is everything is upside down.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes, everything is upside down but that’s what we’re hoping for. A breakthrough because I’m all about marriage breakthrough and this is like a world breakthrough. We want a new reality.

Let’s talk about Pesach for real. How can people actually align their life and their reality with this ideal life that doesn’t feel as tangible, as attainable?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Are you asking me?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I’m asking you. I already have here—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Well, they say how do you get to your goal? Practice, practice, practice. You just keep preparing. Everybody gets ready for Passover. They know how to do it already. You mentioned the woman who buys the stroller—the baby buggy and just be even before she gets pregnant. She knows she wants to have a kid. Jewish people who believe in the Torah, they want to keep the mitzvot, they prepare to do it. The best example, you know that I bought [Hebrew], one of his first books—I don’t know many years before he was conceived, more than a decade before he was conceived because I was working on. You had the instruments of his circumcision before he was even conceived—his tallit even before he was conceived. Why? Because—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Guys, we waited for a boy for 10 years.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Amazing thing, my son—our son was born 10 years to the day from when I first met my wife or at least, I was consciously met my wife. So, that was that was a quite a sign but I was working toward that so as Jews, let’s say many of us move to land of Israel. We want to keep the commandments. For me that’s why I live here. it’s not necessarily because I wanted to join the IDF and fight for the homeland—I’m more of a coward I think or just as they say I’ll say it nicely a man of peace. I came here because I wanted to keep the commandments so thank God, I’m able I have an [inaudible] and I’m able to keep the commandments of the land. I don’t have a wheat farm but I try as much and also I don’t have any animals. I can’t tithe my animals but I hope I hope to one day at least own a token amount of livestock so they could do the commandments. I keep the commandments and that’s why I hope other people do. So, if you want to keep Pesach as it is, you have to get ready for Pesach. They say a person dies and they’ll ask him up in the heavenly court they’ll ask him with a few questions and one of them is [Hebrew]—did you look forward to salvation? It means did you do something to prepare? Many people just say, “Oh, mashiach is coming.” Good. Okay. I’ll be ready when it happens or worse, they say, “Don’t worry. I don’t have to worry about the mashiach comes,” like we mentioned before.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Right. They say it’s like, “When mashiach comes—”

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Hopefully I’ll be able to get away with not doing anything until that point. So, this is a real [Hebrew]. We put that also on the advertisement campaign. We did this because we’re really looking forward to it. We’re trying to show this is how you prepare for such a thing. Yeah, that’s how you’re supposed to prepare.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, so let me tell you a little bit of behind the scenes of how we prepare. So, the night before, when everybody is checking for their Chametz, I get ready to go and you know dunk in the mikvah—how would you say that in English?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Immersion.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Immerse in—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Yeah, I say dunk also, but informally it’s immersion.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Immersed in the—how would you say mikvah?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN
Ritualarium.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

There you go. See, that’s why I have him because he’s fixing—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

A lot of people don’t recognize that word yet so they use the word ritual bath.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Okay, great. So, I go and I purify myself because I have to do it the night before because the women’s ritual bath—how’s that—is not open in the mornings.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

This is the completely disconnected from the reason for the—well, it’s not completely disconnected. This kind but it’s a different realm of halacha. Women normally go to the ritual bath and that’s in, because of points of intimacy and having to do with their the menses and all that and the purification from that, but in this case it is entirely something that’s equal for men and women. Men and women who wish to partake of sacrificial ritual and consumption of sacrificial meat have to ritually purify themselves, and that is not connected for example with specifically ritual immersion at night, except as my wife said the women’s mikvahot, which is the ritual baths happen only to be open at night because that’s when the usual women are going. So, my wife has the past years I’ve made sure that she goes to the ritual bath in preparation for Passover. The only time she can go before Passover, which is the night before the night of checking from comments and we don’t do this instead of checking the Chametz. After, we you know search the house ‘til 11 and do that and the kids are asleep, that’s when she goes. So, that’s a pretty interesting thing. You should—I would expect—on the contrary, that’s when every woman should be going until they open up the women’s ritual baths on heir of Pesach during the day—in the mornings. We’re going to have the situation. I happen to go during the day. I try to do it first thing in the morning.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So then in the morning we burn our Chametz and then the Rabbi goes. So, towards the—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Why I do it after burning the Chametz because burning the Chametz usually gives you all nice and smoky and smokes up your clothes, so I figured it’s a good time to go ritually immersed and all that, and I’m also surprised how it’s you know there are a lot of people in the afternoon that mikhavot. That’s fine but you want to be able to go in the morning so that you could attend the the paschal service in the temple, which is already starting in the afternoon. If you wait till the afternoon to immerse you won’t be able to attend so get your immersion done as soon as possible for Passover and don’t forget, stay pure. There are many things you could do to ruin your purity, so don’t do that. If you want little details, this is not the time place. Basically, avoid what could ruin your purity.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Don’t play with rats. Don’t go playing with rats or as Moses said [Hebrew].

Okay, so then that’s the first thing. The first thing is you have to be pure in order to eat this piece of meat and we want to be ready, and honestly, it’s been so nice because it really brings the ideal into life. It creates a reality even if the reality is just in our home.

Now, the second thing we do is we put a huge suitcase in the middle of the living room and have everyone pack up to go to Jerusalem. So, as we are getting ready for Pesach, everyone—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN
Well, this past year, we actually did it. We didn’t even wait for that point. We actually were in Jerusalem already two days before Passover ready for it. We’re gonna do that again we’ll have we’ll have packed up and ready to go and God willing this year, we’ll get the phone call out—hopefully around one o’clock in the afternoon.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Sounds good.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

So, come in. I’m ready head out to Jerusalem. We’re gonna pack the kids into the car. We’re splitting up the automobiles this year.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So, that’s exciting. We don’t all fit into one car. Isn’t that exciting?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay, just tell them—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Hey, they all know I have seven kids. That makes you have seven kids too.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

The point is you have to be able to get ready to get up and go to Jerusalem, especially if you’re within the radius. The radius defined from Modi’in into Jerusalem. Apparently, New Modi’in is basically roughly around the same area. All Jewish adults, by adults I mean girls over the age of 12 and up, boys 13 and up, even indentured servants, everybody—men and men and women equally are obligated in all of these commandments.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

And I like that this is a commandment that is very equal. So, you can’t say, “Oh, you don’t have to,” or whatever. It’s everybody is an equal here, so if you’re a woman and you’re thinking, “Should I get one?” The answer is yes. If you’re a man and thinking Should I get one? and the answer is yes, and if you’re a teenager and thinking if you should get one again, the answer is yes.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

You have to go to Jerusalem because the Korban Pesah can only be eaten in an area defined as the old city walls of Jerusalem—the old, old city not the current one and the old city’s basically been shifted northward. Basically, it’s only the southern half of the old city and areas to the south of the current old city are eligible for consumption of the Passover sacrifice and then you have to sleep in that area. After you eat the Korban Pesah, you have to somehow sleep within that defined area, so bring your family. That’s what we’re planning to do. We’re gonna head on over. I guess we’ll park the car outside the old city but bring the family in there have Korban Pesah. There’s places we’ll talk about where you could potentially eat it and then bunk down for the night and that would be the commandment. Not everybody has to attend temple, by the way only one representative of the group who are registered for a particular Korban Pesah, which is basically a goat in its first year or lamb in his first year. A male one, and yeah that’s going to be interesting. Don’t forget bring your own lettuce. No, you need to eat it with lettuce or one of the other well the other bitter herbs, chives—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I was gonna say bring your own matzah—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Endives, etc. There’s some other milkweed, whatever it is. There [are] five vegetables you could use from [Hebrew] bring your [Hebrew] that’s any other vegetable. It’s not [Hebrew]. I prefer celery because that’s what karpas means. Bring your wine or your Kitum grape juice. The Maxwell House Haggadat will be useless but Kitum grape juice and Menshevik’s matzo you can still have—your sprites, whichever one floats your boat. Just make sure it’s [Hebrew] matzo.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Wait, it’s not going to be useless because the people who can’t come are still going to have to do Pesach.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

No, it’s going to be useless if you’re doing Korban Pesah and your old Haggadat—and if [Hebrew], that means a heaven forbid or heaven for fend, you get stuck without Korban Pesah, so you’ll have to take out your old Haggadat and I’m actually quite worried because the day we succeeded doing this, all those people who didn’t try, well, it’s pretty bad. The biblical punishment for someone missing out on Korban Pesah when he had a chance to do so is not that not that appetizing. It’s excision. That’s why we have to take this very seriously. One who neglects Korban Pesah is equated with one who neglects circumcision, which is quite bad actually in terms of biblical commandments. So, yeah that’s what you need to know.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I just you know I think of Batya—what’s her name the daughter of king pharaoh who put out her hand to catch Moses even though it was too far away and the fact that she reached—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Who said it was too far? [Inaudible]

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Okay, okay. The fact that she reached and at least tried made it that then it was in reach and I think it’s our responsibility to try to reach out, to do our part, and to stop worrying about how and when and where and all that stuff. One second—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Should I?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I guess—I don’t know. Whatever, okay. Anybody have any questions?

We’re looking through the comments here.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Are the comments visible to everybody?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

No. Some. [On] Facebook they’re visible to Facebook and on YouTube, they’re visible on YouTube.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I think we need to be monitoring this or moderating this.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I haven’t even seen. I haven’t been looking.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay, well I think that someone’s trying to Jesus bomb us.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Well, that’s great. So he wants us to. He says block me. He’s asking. We don’t really care to block people.

Any questions that actually have to do with this will be answered. I have some questions.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay, please.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah. I forgot my questions do you have any questions. Do you have any questions?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

What? You’re supposed to ask me the questions. This is your show.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes. Where can people find you? That’s usually a question that I ask.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Where are you talking about—nowadays, when you ask a question like that—that’s like where? On the internet?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

So put the links there of avrahambenyehudaor just my email address, avrahambenyehuda.wordpress.com/, avraham.grossman@gmail.com. Call me. Avraham is A-V-R-O-H-O-M dot G-R-O-S-S-M-A-N at gmail.com. Look for my website. Google me. You can find some of the videos at Machon Shilo’s YouTube page or my own. Sorry, yeah. YouTube channel or my own YouTube channel and there’s some older ones on TorahBox’s YouTube channel look for all those those are keywords torah box Machon Shilo and just Avraham Ben Yehudaor. Find those things and yeah, you could do a google Haggadat Hapesah. It’s the only one of its kind.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah. I’m gonna tell you where to get this okay because—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

No, let me let me take care of this.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So, on my website connectedforreal.com you will you will find—wait connectedforworld.com/passover-for-real so Passover hyphen for hyphen real and because my business is Connected for Real, I want you to have Passover for real and that’s where you can buy the Haggadat. You can buy it for you and your wife or your husband because I’m a marriage you know coach so I want you guys to be in this together and you can buy them for your friends as presents.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Basically, every household needs one because you need someone to know what to do.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yes, every person needs one because when you’re sitting at the seder, you want to be able to have your own.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

And you want to know what you’re doing also because you haven’t done this yet. It has some surprise. Yes, it’s familiar. The kiddush is the same but that’s it. The Maggid isn’t the same. The order is not the same. There’s some passages like, “Oh, yeah. I’ve seen this before,” but there’s so much that’s different or new. Different and new is specifically color coded so you see it and you have to, I guess, stay on your feet stay on your toes be quick and know what to what to expect that’s different and there’s so many pleasant surprises that it’s exciting almost to see this. You get excited. I think there’s one type of excitement, which is the excitement of the old and familiar. The excitement of taking out whatever it is that your traditional matza cover, the kiddush cup—you take out your Kittel—whatever it is. It gets exciting, like the tradition or even just the traditional recipe. The same matzo ball soup but there’s also an the excitement of the new, the excitement of saying it’s not been done so let’s equate that. You have the excitement of the food, the tastes of Passover. You’ll have those. Also, you could bring your grandmother’s matzo ball soup or whatever else you like but you also get the taste Korban Pesah. It is basically forbidden nowadays, where it’s been forbidden to eat roasted lamb the night of Passover. Now, you can actually taste roasted lamb with that matzo ball soup. That’s a commandment. That’s going to be new. You have the thrill of telling the same story to the children getting excited about that, which we did last year but I could get them even more excited this year. We’re actually in Jerusalem. This year, we’re actually doing it. It’s not just a story of what was long ago. It’s actually real.

Some people, I don’t know why, when they mentioned this before, when they want to get back to Passover, they want to go back to Egypt. Go back to Egypt and enjoy what was like in Egypt, and some of us want to go back to the redemption, what it was like to leave Egypt, the building of the temple is dated to 480 years after the Exodus because that was the culmination. This is the culmination of the Exodus, being able to celebrate in in Jerusalem with the Korban Pesah as God intended. I don’t know anybody with any practical experience but the more people get excited about this, the more people are demanding such a thing more people ready, the more likely it is that we will get achieve our goals soon, and yeah, just think about that. It’s not a fantasy. It’s Zionism.

If you can, like real true looking forward to the future, remember years ago there was no one here. There’s no Jewish city in the land of Israel. Now, there are plenty of Jewish cities. Thank God many large Jewish families, yeshivas, synagogues, at least some good synagogues, and you know—so you can know—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, I love your excitement. That’s what fueled this thing because there’s a real desire.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

It surprises me how many people are not on board with this. I mean, I’m very excited with all the people who are but there’s so many people. Just look. Are you telling me you could do this? I’m telling you you could do this. This is a real thing. This is real. This is what God intended. This is going to happen. I tell you, some people—I guess it’s a [Hebrew]. You said like, people don’t have children. I don’t know many people who are still without children. I have friends—yeah, I have friends who are still without child. Tell them you’re going to have a child next year like when [Hebrew] were told on Passover. By the way, it was on Passover that the angel came. The angels came and told Abraham, “You’re going to have a kid next year. Your wife—she’s been childless. She’s 90 years old. You’re 100. You couple—you’re going to have a kid next year and they both laughed in different ways. That was on Passover. So, too I’m telling you come Passover, you are going to be sitting. You’re going to have left the temple. Temple’s closed at night. You’ll be eating the Korban Pesah in Jerusalem like you always thought you’re going to do. That’s going to be happening. You’re going to laugh. You think it’s unbelievable but it’s what God intended. That’s why Isaac was born on Passover. His birth was foretold on Passover and his birth took place on Passover. Why? Because he symbolizes it’s gonna happen. You think it’s a joke, you think it’s wonderful [Hebrew].

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Here, you got a nice comment.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN
Who is this? I hope you have your copy of the Haggadat, by the way.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, make sure to get one. Connectedforreal.com/Passover-for-real

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

My time is up, by the way.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

No, we still have minutes for my time because you got cut off before.

So, here’s the thing. I want to talk to you guys about that—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Does that mean I have to stay?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes, yes.

Because I think it’s really what’s really interesting and what I wanted to talk about is because I’m a marriage coach and all of you guys are always learning from me when I bring other people in, one of the things that makes it really interesting is to actually see the behind the scenes of my own marriage and what the Rabbi just talked about was like, “O,h it’s surprising how many people aren’t ready. It surprises me how many people don’t sound interested or think I’m not really there,” whatever.

I like to focus on what is and who is interested and all the excitement around it, so I am more of like the but look at the bright side and there’s—that sometimes gets in the way because I get a little annoying about it. What did you say?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN
Okay, it’s fine. I’d say no.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So, I think that’s another thing that’s fun about being so different is I’m a little bit more into the focusing on the positive and you’re just dealing with more people and selling it door-to-door. So, you’re more involved.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I guess I’m a lot more pragmatic with this. Thank God I’ve been privileged to go on a few speaking engagements this year. Now that the Corona’s over, you can imagine when the when the Haggadat was first published and they went out to start selling it, they closed the bookstores. They told me I couldn’t leave my house. We were basically locked down.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes, the first year we printed in January.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I did not go anywhere to—I couldn’t publicize the Haggadat. I couldn’t promote it or anything or you get it to anybody and talking—I was telling people we’re going to go to Jerusalem for Pesach and people are saying they’re in fear of death. They thought they’re going to die when they couldn’t leave their houses and we basically didn’t go out for was it three weeks before Passover and three weeks after Passover. We didn’t—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

That was the first lockdown.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Yeah, it was ridiculous and then the next year, I very limited engagements. I remember one place I was speaking to the students at the Yeshiva and I had to be behind with Plexiglas. I was basically in the penalty box but now, thank God, this year we’re getting to quite a few places.

I’m going to be in—tomorrow night I’m going to Jerusalem in one place. Sunday, we have two engagements and the day after that a few more engagements. Thursday night, we’re going to be in Har Nof and Harish speaking to adults and also check out Chairish, eight o’clock [on] Sunday night, Israel time. It’s going to be daylight savings time and again in Har Nof before Passover and some more. There’s another one we’re going down to Even Shmuel—speak a few places in Jerusalem, mostly anglo-crowds—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

No but then Even Shmuel is at eight in Hebrew.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

It’s gonna be in Hebrew? Well, you didn’t tell me that. Yeah, okay so it’s gonna be in Hebrew, I guess. Don’t worry, we’ll just have to press the Hebrew button before we start—the keyboard so if—thank God we’re getting out and getting to hear people. So did that have to do with the questions? Is that what you wanted me to say?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

I didn’t want you to say anything. I think they want to hear you know the authentic side of things.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

You throw in a few minutes ago you said you had minutes, so that’s your time.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So, oh okay. The Rabbi’s tired. I think we gotta go, but here’s the deal.

What do you want me to call you?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN
You usually you call me Avi or something or you can say my husband or something.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

My husband. The Rabbi. I’m very proud of you.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay, thanks. Okay, yeah. Okay, the Rebbetzin.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

The Rabbi. Okay, so this comes in Hebrew and in English. The Hebrew edition was printed first. This is the translated. Of course, it’s made of two parts.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

It’s almost interlinear. It’s like you’re—in one case, we took a page out of the ArtScroll, not literally. There’s a Hebrew on one side [and] English on the other.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Well, I don’t think ArtScroll is the first [one] to do that.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I’m not saying—ArtScroll is the more most common one. Does this—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So, okay. The first part is essays and the essays are really here to give you the answers, the pointers—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

The introductions—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yes, the explanations. This will answer a lot of your questions, and those are really, really interesting. High-level stuff. You’re gonna like it.

Devorah says, “I love you guys.” Thank you. I love you too.

The second part of the Haggadat is the actual text you’re going to be using. As I said, some of it is purple to show you and highlight to you what is different and what is new, and that’s the exciting stuff. When you say that stuff, I am envisioning already the tears coming down. It’s exciting. It’s beautiful and—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I’ve actually cried over this thinking about the last two Passovers when we didn’t get to use this. I went to the temple last year in era of Pesach. I tried to get in. I presented myself. We were all prepared in the politics and police, and just like, “Nope,” so it was a real disappointment. So I’m hoping this year, praying for it. Clutch your hands.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

No, no clutching.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Kiss your children. We have to really hope for this. We try so hard.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, yeah but I think that going out of your comfort zone and trying something that you believe is necessary but nobody has ever seen happen before, that’s what it’s all about. The trust and the leap of faith. Faith and trust—they’re two different things but I think they work together.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I described it already. Faith is knowledge. You know belief in God. Trust means the next step. Are you really to fall backwards, you think he’s going to catch you? Most people haven’t taken that. So, they haven’t shown that leap of faith.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So leap of faith equals trust.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Yeah, they haven’t demonstrated their trust yet. A lot of people have a hard time. Whatever. That’s very difficult.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Listen. Legit. If you’re scared, you’re scared and that’s okay. Everybody has emotions but I think the really cool thing about it is that you can actually do something, so go and do it.

You can get in touch with us on WhatsApp and we will send you a link of how to order it or you can buy it from the website connectedforreal.com/Passover-for-real Passover for real.

What is the reason for a woman to go to the mikvah in the era of Pesach?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Oh, that’s an actual question. Anybody who wishes to partake of sacrificial food, for example or even promote the priestly portions or to enter the temple complex has to ritually purify himself. There are certain forms of ritual purification which are we are uncapable of doing and which remove certain types of contamination. Bodily contamination which is caused by a number of things is radically different from the contamination a person would incur or would, I guess, he would he would acquire if he came into contact with the dead and there’s only one way to remove that impurity but that in purity.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah she’s asking about para dumas yeah.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

I’m answering that Para Tuma removes death and purity but the Torah says [Hebrew] derives this from the torah as our sages did that death and purity doesn’t count the whole rules of death and purity and purification they’re from—are basically ignored when everybody is impure like that. That’s a long process to a long process of purification and they already said it happened a few times in history, when they realize that the majority—we assume that the majority is like this today. Majority have that type of impurity. We just ignore it entirely. You could build the temple tomorrow and put the at least put the altar there and start the sacrificial service, the priests will only have to go to mikveh to the bodily impurities and they will not have to wait seven days to purify themselves from the deathly impurity that they may have incurred sometime early in their life. They just ignore that. The temple service goes on. The only difference is that certain sacrifices are not consumed. If they bring a sin offering, a person and brings a sin offering, the priests will not eat the meat of the sin offering. They’ll burn that beyond the temple.

The only sacrifice that is actually eaten when brought in a state of impurity by state of encouragement that we haven’t purified anybody from the deathly encouraged because we don’t have the ashes of the red cow is the Korban Pesah. The Korban Pesah is eaten even in this state. However, we still have to remove these other forms of impurity—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So, here’s the answer to the question. The question came back again so why do we need to be pure using the mikveh if [Hebrew]?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Yes, that’s talking about the [Hebrew], the deathly impurity but bodily impurity that is the impurity you get from, for example, a woman just having her peridot or giving birth or a man who’s experienced the seminal emission for whatever reason whatsoever, whether permissible, impermissible, voluntary or involuntary or a guy who, let’s say just touched a dead rodent to a reptile, those are all different types of impurity and all of those are removed through immersion in the ritual bath. So, in order to be able to partake of Korban Pesah. You have to at least do that that same standard we have with—by the way, entering the temple mount today. There are areas where people who have death impurity cannot go but they still those who have at least been to the ritual bath can go to certain places.

Is there a follow-up question?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Yeah, bodily impurity is not what [Hebrew]?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

No, no, no. Bodily impurity is not permitted that is something. That can always be removed through mikveh so that is saying that there is no dispensation. Every priest who serves in the temple by the way has to go to the ritual bath immediately before donning his priestly vestments, and then he puts those on and then he has to once again, wash his hands and feet within the courtyard of the temple. That’s his ritual and an ordinary jew, man or woman, who wants to enter at least the temple mount has to go to a ritual bath, and in this case there are places where he’s not allowed to go to unless he has to offer sacrifice and what we’re going to do is nowadays—because let’s say today. Today was Wednesday. So, the Jews who went up on to visit the temple and I equate the temple with the temple mount because Maimonides and the sages did. The jew visited the temple today went to the ritual bath and then he was able to crown the temple mount. He was not allowed to enter the area that was the inner courtyard of the temple because he would did not bring sacrifice but if he had had the chance to do so, he would have been allowed even beyond that, so that’s what we intend to do if we do not get this whole death impurity thing straightened out before Passover, it takes at least a week to get it straightened out because the just the ritual of purification through the ashes of the red cow and the droplets, etc., that takes a week. If we don’t get that sorted out by then we’ll still go ahead with the temple service like I said go to the mikveh beforehand. All men and women, and basically anybody of bar mitzvah age has to go.

We have this thing here could a Korban Pesah practically be brought today and then you would be able to eat it because you went to the mikvah? Yes, that’s exactly what we’re trying to say. This is what the sages say. This is what is in the codes. All you need is ritually pure priests and Israelites who have been to mikvah and they did it properly, by the way, prepared for the merchant if they did not prepare properly then they’re immersion does not count but that’s all it takes and the priests, of course have to be wearing priestly vestments, which is saying they’re already producing. We know how to do these things. It’s very well documented. We have the materials. All the technicals are easily straightened out. Also, the construction of an altar is saying we know how to do—we know where to put the altar, we know where the temple is supposed to be—the minimal minimum Sheba minimum as they would say, we need the place of the altar, we need priests, we need Israelites, we need a few sacred vessels. They have to catch the blood of the sacrifice in a sacred vessel in order to apply it to the place of the altar or the altar itself, God willing—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

And the animal?

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Yeah, you need yeah the animals we have and—don’t hurt the book—so, that’s all we need to do, and the sacrifice will go through and then you gotta roast the Korban Pesah and make sure you stay pure in order to eat the Korban Pesah. A person who only purified the day before anytime after sunset on the night of 14th of Passover, the night of [Hebrew], his purity to be able to eat the corn Pesach will only kick in the next night at when the stars come out. That is the night of Pesach when the stars come out. Nightfall.

So, he’s ritually pure enough to attend the sacrifice. He’s ritually pure enough to slaughter the sacrifice and roast it and prepare it for consumption, but to actually eat at the seder, he has to wait for a night to fall because then his full purity will kick in and that’s a technical thing also. Look for the [Hebrew]—about that I find this sort of fascinating.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

So, the follow-up is or is it not actually practical today? It is practical if we were allowed to do it.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Not only is it practical. Tomorrow morning there are people who are ready to offer sacrifice in the place of the temple. Tomorrow morning all they have to be is permission. That is the only thing that is missing. They have the altar ready, they have the priests ready, they have the animals ready, everything is ready to go. All we need is enough people to make it happen, so that’s kind of surprising. That’s the situation we’ve been in now for 55 years, by the way. The temple service is ready to go for the last years. There are people ready, willing and able to do it and all the technicals are straightened out. That’s why this is such a surprise.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

You’d have to work pretty fast.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

No, you don’t have to work pretty fast. You know, this is all—

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Well, you only have to work really fast if you were hiding something but if you’d have permission, which is the only thing missing, then it would be done.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

And I thank you all we’re normally—well, that’s it. Have a good night, everybody. We’re signing off now.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Thank you so much for coming and joining me on this really fascinating podcast episode. I hope you enjoyed my special guest. Probably, the only male guest I will ever have unless my father decides to be a guest too.

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Why not?

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Maybe but I don’t usually have men who are not my family members and—

RABBI AVI GROSSMAN

Okay just say good night.

REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN

Say good night.

Thank you so much make sure to come and follow me and join me on all of my awesome things that I do with all of marriage and life. I will see you guys next time. All the best. Anybody who asks questions or has more questions, make sure to send them our way. You can find me at @connectedforreal on Instagram and on Facebook. Good night.

And that’s it! Thank you for listening to the very end. I would love if you can leave a review and subscribe to the podcast. Those are things that tell the algorithm, this is a good podcast and make sure to suggest it to others. Wouldn’t it be amazing if more people became more connected for real? And now, take a moment and think of someone who might benefit from this episode. Can you share it with them? I am Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman from connectedforreal.com. Thank you so much for listening, and don’t forget, you can be connected for real.

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