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In This Episode
Rebbetzin Bat-Chen always knew she was going to be a leader. She owes her love for people to her mother, Rebbetzin Naomi Gez, because of her strength and resilience as a mother and wife. Naomi shows she is full of life because she believes everyday Hashem gives her is a gift, so she uses it to do good through her polymer clay jewelry business by teaching children science, art, and lifelong values, and shidduchim for couples who want to get married. This feel-good episode between mother and daughter will make you want to pursue the things that fill you up, call your mom, and give her the biggest hug!
Highlights
01:11 Rebbetzin Naomi Gez is a proud mother to Rebbetzin Bat-Chen, who has bloomed into a good mother, wife, and daughter.
01:49 For 36 years, Rebbetzin Naomi taught Ibrite, Torah, and Judaic studies all over the world.
02:37 There was a challenging event in the family that Naomi overcame using her faith and confidence in herself and in Hashem, and by combining her artistic side and love for children.
03:18 Art for Me by Naomi was established by Naomi before the pandemic to teach children science, art, and lifelong values through the process of creating polymer clay jewelry.
04:14 Aside from children, Rebbetzin Naomi is very fond of people, especially those who are about to get married. Through making polymer clay jewelry, Naomi could get to know the couple.
05:30 Every person has a soul, and Rebbetzin Naomi believes that each soul speaks and expresses oneself through creativity.
08:06 For Rebbetzin Bat-Chen’s daughter’s Bat Mitzvah, the guests made their own necklace and bracelet. What was amazing to see was how the material was able to be used as a creative outlet, even for those who were not familiar with how to use it.
09:08 Even if the process to create the polymer clay material has to be precise, there are no rules when it comes to art–you are always right. Putting the piece on after making your own jewelry gives people confidence.
09:48 Rebbetzin Naomi sees people and the world as colorful, and she encourages people to be different.
10:28 Creating art with Rebbetzin Naomi is not only about the beads that are made, but also the connection of generations to continue the chain of Torah and Jewish culture.
11:39 Each one who makes a necklace is very important. No matter how different each one is, like a handmade bead, each person is beautiful in their own way.
12:11 For Pesach, Rebbetzin Naomi teaches Schulchcan HaSeder (the Passover set up) through a creative art project with her namesake.
13:30 Sparky Type is a cool online personality quiz that helps you find the thing that sparks you. Rebbetzin Bat-Chen describes Naomi as a maker and a teacher.
14:05 Rebbetzin Naomi gives credit to her husband, who helps her with her business.
14:47 Because all the children are grown up and have moved out, Naomi and her husband found joy in making their jewelry and wine.
15:24 It is very important to discover new things and having fun while enjoying each other’s company when your children have families of their own.
15:40 Fueling the things that you and your partner love to do brings fun and discovery into the relationship.
16:11 One of the secrets to marriage is that couples must give each other space to express themselves and do the things the love.
17:41 Every day that Hashem gives us is a gift, and we should embrace getting older because it’s another day to do better things.
20:29 Rebbetzin Naomi gave a review on the Marriage Breakthrough Retreat in February 2020, which transformed from seeing the retreat with a proud mother eyes to someone who felt connected for real.
22:12 The Marriage Breakthrough Retreat was amazing, especially the feedback I received after participants applied the practical tips they learned to be Connected for Real.
25:29 Naomi describes each child as a different flower in her garden that needs to be taken care.
25:35 When it comes to teaching children, Rebbetzin Naomi gets inspiration from Hashem, who does not force Himself onto us. In the same way, she doesn’t force herself unto her students, but builds connections with them first.
30:33 A child’s parents and teachers are part of their team, and it’s important for the parents to be confident in their child’s teacher.
32:24 As a marriage coach, Rebbetzin Bat-Chen helps her clients find their why. She shares how one of her clients wants to continue the chain and pass on everything that was passed on to her.
37:21 Rebbetzin Naomi gives words of encouragement to people in the time of corona
39:50 During a stressful period, such as the coronavirus pandemic, it is important to find the thing that you love to do that will make you feel safe and fill you up because it brings you out of this world and gives you power.
42:34 When Rebbetzin Naomi was a schoolgirl, her mother would make her think of homework as a game to relieve her stress. This is how she handled online class through Zoom during the pandemic.
43:43 Rebbetzin Naomi was able to learn how to operate Zoom and calls herself the “Queen of Zoom.” Learning to operate Zoom had its messiness and mistakes, but Naomi reminds us that mistakes are beautiful.
44:07 The jewelry making workshops by Rebbetzin Naomi might be available online soon! Inquire now.
45:37 Children are always developing through their abilities to be present, to play, and to have fun, but adults can do this too because the soul doesn’t age.
Links
Art for Me by Naomi: Facebook | Instagram | YouTube
5 Surprising Ways to Improve Your Marriage
Marriage Breakthrough Retreat
Sparky Type
Let’s Connect!
Connected for Real is on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn
For more information about Connected for Real, visit the website!
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REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Welcome to the Connected For Real Podcast! I’m Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman, a marriage coach for women in business, and my mission is to bring God’s presence into your life, into your marriage, and into your business. Let’s get started. The following is one of the many conversations I had with experts and professionals about real life and how it affects marriage. Let me know your takeaways on Instagram or Facebook, @connectedforreal. Enjoy. And we are live today with a very special guest, my mother. For all of you who don’t know, I am Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman from connectedforreal.com and I am a marriage coach for women in business. This is my mother. I wanted to come and bring her on for the first time for you guys to get a little peek of what it’s like from the other perspective, and also to see what she’s up to because she also has a business. Ima, introduce yourself.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Shalom, everybody. I am Ima shel [mother of] Bat-Chen—Rebbetzin Bat-Chen—I’m very proud. I’m so happy to see Bat-Chen blooming and giving advices—such a good mother—Baruch HaShem—a good wife, a good daughter, and very active. This girl is very active. That is not a little girl anymore. It’s an Ima. Yes, so it’s very nice.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
So, tell us what you do and what exciting things you’re working on.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
I am a teacher for many, many years since Bat-Chen was born. Can I say the age, Bat-Chen? So it’s 36 years that I’m a teacher, and I was a teacher all over the world. Wherever we lived, I taught Ibrite, Torah, and all Judaic studies. We were in Venezuela. We were in Argentina, we went to Houston, Texas and Michigan. Of course, we began in Israel, in Karnei Shromron and Natanya. I love teaching. I love children. I love people, and now I arrived to a stage that I felt that I can bring something more to all the Judaic studies, the Hebrew, and all these, and I went back to art—always I was very creative but now there was some very challenging event in the family, and I felt that I entered my bed and put my pillow on my face and forget about everything, or that the better idea is to do something good and to show Hashem that I have power and I can overcome it, and I have a Emuna and bitachon (faith and trust)—it means faith and confidence in myself and in Hashem. I decided that because I love children, because I love people, because I love this life, because I love nature, colors and creativity, I began to make jewelry from polymer clay. I saw that it’s a world [of] infinity—infinity of possibilities, of colors of teaching children, and I saw that I can reach children with a lot more than the art. I can reach children with experience of science—to know colors, to know mixing of colors, shapes, to feel the material, to be patient, to understand what is a process of work. So, I saw that there are many, many benefits. Besides that, I love people. I love people to get married. So, I decided why I don’t bring people to my house? It was [a] long time ago before the corona time. People used to come to my house. It was also men and also a woman that wanted to get married, and instead of asking them to give me a piece of paper with resume that doesn’t tell me anything about them. It’s like, “Drink Coca-Cola. Thank you.” How do I know who you are, what do you do? It’s like to say, “Yes, I have good midot (qualities). I’m a nice person. I’m—” Everybody is nice. Everybody has good qualities, but how do I know how to match who to what? So how do I know? I decided I want to know the people. Baruch HaShem (thank God). I make some shidduchim (matches) and I knew the people. I asked the people to come here, and I knew them. This way, I said, “Wow, it’s so relaxing to come here,” and to do some art project and people really are amazing. All the ages. So, it’s not only for children. Everybody has a soul inside. Everybody has something that he feels, that can give, that can express himself, and words are not the only way to express ourselves. I believe that His Neshama talks—your soul talks when you create, so I was very surprised to see what beautiful things people did and are making. When we put in the oven all the beads, I have time to take my notebook and to write what are you looking for. Also, I have the impression of the person. I have the image. I know how you look, how you work, if you have patience, if you’re rushing, what is your temperament, how do you talk, and you can know so many things about a person. His Neshama is talking. That’s it.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
I think this was the longest time I was quiet in an interview. [Laughs] I was thinking, “Wow, everything she’s saying is so perfect. I’m not going to interject anything,” and it was just one after the other. It was just perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect. First thing that I was thinking is if you guys were wondering where I got my love for people, this is it. [Laughs] I love people and it’s because you love people. We always had people over, and we always got to connect to new people. That was something that’s a real gift, so thank you.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
First of all, I want to give you a sticker for being so quiet. If you were my student for sure a coupon.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
It’s a record. Oh, wow. Yes. So, let’s just make a little bit of organization in everybody’s head. So really there’s two parts to it because there is the Art for Me by Naomi, which is all of the things that you make and then sell. You have such a huge collection. It’s the coolest thing to go shopping in Ima’s closet because it’s the entire spectrum of colors and shapes. It’s so colorful, so much fun, full of life, and of course people can order custom things, which I’ve seen were absolutely amazing. So, that’s one side but then there is the workshops and the interaction side, and that’s really important and beautiful. For our daughter’s Bat Mitzvah, we had a party where everybody got to make their own necklace and matching bracelet. The girls loved it. The coolest thing to see is even the people who weren’t confident with art—all you need to do is mix a couple of colors and start working it. Suddenly you’re like, “Wow, I did that? This is so cool.” It’s something that the material lends itself to allow for that really creative outlet without having to have so much skill.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Yes, I agree with you, Bat-Chen, and I want to tell you that when you teach a material, you cannot be so flexible because one plus one is two. The Alef (first letter in the Hebrew alphabet) is this shape, the verb is this verb, and the perek (character) in Torah is this perek. Okay, you can be creative, but you have the basic things that you have to know in order to know the material. What is nice about art—that you are always right. Sometimes, the kids or people ask me, “Is it okay?” I say, “If you like it, it’s okay. If you like it, it’s okay.” There are no rules beside the rules, of course, of science that you have to put it in the oven. You have to make sure that you have a bead, right? But it’s so beautiful that there is no judgment, and people that are very quiet and not have confidence, suddenly they see that they have something to give. When they put their necklace or the earrings that they made, suddenly, “Wow!” It gives confidence. It’s very nice. This is also part, I think, of how I see the world. I see the world that the world is colorful. People are colorful. People are different, and I encourage it. I encourage everybody to be himself and to express himself. I encourage it as a teacher, as a mother, as a person, and I try not to judge people because everybody comes from a different background, everybody come from a different culture, everybody loves different shapes and colors, and whatever, so it’s very broad. It’s not only about the bead that we’re making. For the Bat Mitzvah that I’m making, I have also a beautiful speech about our connection to the past and the Bat Mitzvah is now to get the mitzvot to do the Torah and now the mitzvot. How we are connected to generations that are before us and how we take upon us the responsibility to continue this chain of Torah and culture—Jewish culture, and not only Jewish, right? Everybody is continue something of his ancestor. So I begin with Moshe Rabenu (Moses), Yehoshua (Joshua), the zkenim (the elders) and all this, and we get till us. We see how important is when you make it a chain–a necklace, be careful because if you take it in the air before you fix it, you close it, you tie it so you can lose all the chain—all the generation of falling. So it’s very nice and children can feel connection to that. Also, to feel part of the group, I tell all the girls or the children we are all like a big necklace all around the table, and each one of us is very important. We are all different. Your beads that you are making—it’s handmade. It means that each one will be different, not the same shape, not the same color—everything has his own personality. It’s like us. We are different and that’s the beauty, but together, we are in composition.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Mind blown.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
For Pesach, I decided to do, with the children Schulchcan Pesach (the Passover table). Instead of giving all the vocabulary, to do it very boring, and the children again have to write and all this, I decided we will make an art project of Schulchcan HaSeder (the Passover set up). In this way, they will learn what to put on the Schulchcan (table) and then they have more motivation to write sentences in Hebrew. They have more motivation to enter to the subject. Okay, so to learn this I made with my granddaughter Naomi Gez, that is six years old, and we looked in the internet. We took a picture of the Kearat Pesach (Passover plate), and we saw what the celery, the egg, the Charosset, the lettuce, and the Maror (bitter herb). Here you have the chicken and then we put the shalosh (three), the three Matzot (Matza) and a plate for everybody. The yellow is Haggadah. It’s not like Shabbat (sabbath). You have the Haggadah. This way, it’s so nice to learn, and it’s so nice to express yourself. You show that you know, and if you don’t know, you look and you copy and all this. It’s very creative.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
If any of you guys want to know something—a really cool resource, it’s called Sparky Type. Go to sparkytype.com and it’s a little quiz. It asks you questions about your personality. It helps you find your spark—the thing that sparks you, and it’s a different type of personality type. One of the things I love about Ima is that she’s a maker and she’s a teacher. She brings value in what she makes, which is such a nice combination, and I love that.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Thank you, Bat-Chen. I appreciate that. I have to give credit also to my husband that is very talented—a very handy man, right? So, he is doing all this work that I don’t know to do– to fix everything, to close it. In the earrings also—he is putting all this Sofer Stam (scribe), Mohel (a person who performs ritual Jewish circumcisions). He has good hands. So, I have to give credit to my husband, and it’s nice because now we don’t have kids at home, and we didn’t buy any dog. [Laughs]
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
I didn’t expect you to. [Laughs]
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
It’s very quiet here, so it’s a new challenge. It’s nice. He’s making wine, I’m making jewelry, and he’s helping me with my jewelry. When we had groups here, he used to give them wine when everything was in the oven, so it was a big happening here. It’s very nice so it’s another thing to think about when you arrive to almost 60—that still there is something to experiment, to do, to begin. It’s a new era. Your children are not home but you can begin something new.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yeah, and I love that you brought that up because it’s so important to always be discovering, playing, and staying in that mode of finding how to make it fun and how to enjoy each other’s company. This is really important, and I want you all to notice that the genius behind what’s going on here. It’s that every single one of them is leaning into the things they love and that brings out that feeling of discovery and fun. It’s not like they have to hide themselves or mute themselves to let the other person have room. It’s that each one is really fueling the thing that fills them up and then together, it creates a new reality, which I think is really amazing.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
There is time in a couple there is time that you have to give space to everybody to express himself and to do whatever he likes. I cannot be [there] when he is making the wine because it makes me nauseous to see all these grapes, so he’s doing it when I’m not there. It’s like to clean the fish or to clean the chicken. No, it’s not for me. There are things that he is making and I’m happy that I’m not there, and there are things that we like to do together. If he’s doing a Daf yomi (daily learning) he’s studying Gmara (Talmud), so it’s not for me so I go with my radio and I’m happy. So yes, there are times that you have to be together. There are times you have to be alone, and that’s one of the secrets.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yes, we love your secrets. Thank God. I think that one of the things that left the biggest impression on me was when you guys were turning 50, and you said, “We’re going on an adventure,” in order to just enjoy time together, enjoy life. All of the people around us are turning 50 and getting divorced, and we’re like, “No, way we are going to do something different.” I think that was just really conscious. It was a conscious decision to choose something different. You know what you were saying, “I don’t feel like I’m almost 60.” You don’t have to feel anything. I don’t know how it feels. It is what it is.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
I cannot wait for my birthday. Sixty—it’s such a nice birthday.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
One of the things I love about Ima is that when we were growing up, she was always so proud of her birthday. People were saying, “No, 29 forever,” and she’s like, “No way. I’m not giving back any day. I’m enjoying my life to the fullest,” and it leaves an impression. It really does. It’s like, “I’m choosing to live. I’m choosing to enjoy every moment and not let numbers define me.” I think is really important.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
So, I want to tell you that life is a gift, and every day that Hashem gives us on this planet—it’s a gift and I feel that every birthday I thank Hashem. I really appreciate life and I thank Hashem for the good and for the bad, for the bitter and for the sweet, that’s life but Baruch HaShem. We are here and I say to “Toda Rabba Hashem (thank you Hashem)” and older you are, more thank you you have. Why I want to be 29, 25, or 18? If I have more experience of life and more Baruch HaShem (thank God), Nachat (pride from the children) and sechel (wisdom)—and your life it’s a journey. You have to enjoy that journey and to appreciate the journey, and then not have this mentality of all the customer service that they want to sell you things to look younger. Who said younger is better? You have to be clean. You have to be neat. You have to be nice. You have to be from the inside, sincere, to look for good, to do good things, and to think what is life about. Life is about being nice to other people, to be nice to yourself. A life is relationship. Life is what we live here. After, we leave. We go to Shamayim (heaven). So, this is life. This is life. Enjoy your life. What is it—HaOlam Shayach Latzeirim (the world belongs to the youth). The world is for the young people. No. The world is for everybody. The world is for everybody. The life is for everybody. There is no age. Age is only to be better and to do better things because in the end of the story, what they will remember from us—the good things that we do, and the beautiful things that we live—art project, books—I don’t know—things. Heritage. What do you want people to remember of you? What do you want your grandchildren to say about you? This is what’s important so every 10 years—wow, it’s a big number. Sixty is nice.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
What I wanted to ask you was how was it for you to be on the other side of the retreat because I had a retreat on February 15th and it was seven days. It was virtual, and it was amazing. For me, it was amazing and you were there every day. I wanted to know what you thought about it from your perspective.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
So in the beginning, I was like, “Wow, I’m so proud of my daughter. I will go because it’s my daughter.” I was like a mother. After five minutes, I forgot that you are my daughter. I forgot I am your mother. I just enter to a different place, and I said, “Wow, this is so nice. I love the activity. I loved the way you were talking. “Wow, this is really a talent to put together people that don’t know each other, and everybody can relate, can write about herself, and ask questions.” I really think that it’s amazing. It’s really amazing. I enjoyed so much and also to meet other women when you broke the rooms in the Zoom. Really, it was so nice. The day that we didn’t have anymore, I felt such emptiness because I used to come from school and for me it was one o’clock afternoon. “Yeah, I have a plan,” and then all-day afternoon, I was thinking about it. I was writing for myself. You gave me so good ideas and really, I felt so empty I said, “Wow, I’m sad that it’s over.” I had a good time.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Thank you. I think that the retreat, for me, was a step up. I always knew that I was going to be a leader, and doing the retreat made me that leader. It was just like, “Whoa.” It was almost like a pie in my face, seeing myself reflected, and the amount of I don’t know how to even describe it, but for me that was really powerful. It was a lot of fun that you were there, and also my sister was there. It just made it really special. Besides the other 30 people who were there, which was mind-blowing, and the coolest part of the whole thing was that I was so impressed that most of you guys came regularly. You didn’t drop off. You know how all these challenges you end up dropping off? You’re like, “Oh, my day challenge. I’ll do day one, day two—” and by day three you’re like, “I can’t. I can’t hold on anymore.” People were just coming back, they were on time, they were taking notes, and they were just so involved. The best part of the whole thing, which completely blew me away was the feedback at the end, or not even at the end—the whole time. It was like, “I spoke to my husband for the first time, and we actually had what to talk about. We actually went out for a walk. I just went downstairs and told him, “I’m sorry,” and he said he loves me. That was the first time we got to really spend time together. Oh, wow. That for me was like, “This is it, people. This is what we’re all about.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
It’s interesting that you call it Connected for Real, and I felt connected for real. I didn’t feel that I’m doing a favor to my daughter to be there. It was really for me, and I felt that, “Wow. Eize yoffi (so nice)—has so many good things.” You said and you touch—unbelievable. I admire you.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Thank you. Thank you so much. This is so fun. Okay, if you did not come to the retreat or if you came and you want to come again, which you’re totally welcome to do, this is the link: connectedforreal.com/retreat, and you make sure that you sign up so that you can come. It’s going to be even more epic because I’m listening to all the recordings and I’m taking notes so I’m having so much fun processing the whole process and then creating something even better. Make sure you go and sign up. Do you have anything to add, Ima?
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
That I love children. I love children. I just think that the brain of a child is amazing and when they do mistakes, I let them learn from their mistakes and this is the best way to learn. Everybody has a different brain and everybody has [a] different way of thinking, and if they do a mistake it’s because they think a certain way. I love to learn the mistake to understand what’s going on in the box here. It’s amazing. It’s so nice in grammar, in the history, in the Torah—it’s so nice to see to teach a second language—is very interesting.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
We have a question here. How did you get inspired to teach children or better yet how can you get a child interested in learning the curriculum?
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
This is that question of education if there was one answer, wow. Of course, life is a mystery, and teaching and learning is a mystery. When I begin the year, I learn my students and I learn who is what. Everybody is a different world. Everybody is [a] different flower in my garden, and I have to know this one wants more water, this one wants more sun, and this one to be in the shade, one is from spring, and one is for the winter. Really, you have to wait [for] the child to be mature and you have to find a way to connect. Connected for real—that’s so true, Bat-Chen because if I’m not connected to a child, forget it. Now, my first idea in education is I don’t care about the book. I don’t care about the notebook. I care about the child. I care about my student. He has to be in the same game with me. I cannot force nobody, and I believe in that in all my heart—that you cannot force people. Even Hashem cannot force Himself on us. We say that HaKol b’yidai Shamayim chutz m’yirat Shamayim. It means that everything is coming from Hashem—from above but to believe in Hashem comes from us. So [it’s] the same thing. I want the child to have the motivation and this is the most important thing. That’s why I’m so creative because children can connect when they create something. They can connect, then they have [a] kind of confidence, and then they are open to learn more. We have to know what quantity to give and how to give it. I had a student that in the beginning of the year was afraid to read—was terrified and I saw that she is so afraid. She was all red if I had to tell her to read. I let her go. I didn’t ask her. I built first a connection and I gave her positive reinforcement for the way that she is writing because she has a beautiful handwriting, things like that, and then today she is reading. She is even the Chazzanit (leader) in the morning for The Tfilah (prayers). So yeah, we’ll find a way to every child. There is no one formula. We are all different and we have to find a way. That’s life. The connection.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
I think that’s the gift that you’re so focused on the children and on your job as a teacher that I think that you forget or maybe get distracted from that’s the gift that allows you to then make matchmaker, shiudduchim, and things like that because you allow people—you know, we’re all grown up but we’re all children, and especially a person who’s dating, they’re looking for their wife, their husband—they’re in this place of—I think it was the hardest place to be, where you’re praying for something you know that you want it. You’re trying so hard to figure yourself out, what’s important to me and what’s not important to me, and it’s a really confusing time in your life. In the middle of all this, and you’re really in your head a lot of the time, to just lower all that stress and be in your heart, in your body, in the colors, in the shapes, in the action and just let that be—it’s that door that opens to really getting to know them without having to be so head-to-head like that. It’s the same approach, the same gift that allows for that.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
I can test a child without a written test if it’s a nightmare for him to write two sentences in Hebrew. So I can ask him to draw a picture or to do a comics of the paragraph of the Perek (chapter), and then I know if he get it or no. I can correct and this is a very easy way to correct. “Oh, you have to put him in this place and not in this place. He was from this family and on this family.” The child, in the end of the story, you will know the subject. So I cannot push and press if you are not mature and ready. You will be mature next year. What happened? I have to give the base.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yeah, and the base is really that emotional stability—the stability and the confidence building the foundations. Very lucky the students that get Mrs. Gez are very, very lucky.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
I love also the parents. I must tell you. I work a lot with parents and we are a team. We are together for the child. We are a team, and it’s very important for the parent to have confidence in the teacher, and to know that the interest of the teacher is—my merchandise is the knowledge. My merchandise is to teach, is to give, so I have the interest for children to buy my merchandise. I have to do everything for children and parents to feel confident.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Some of the people in the retreat were really commenting it was so nice to see not only that I am who I am, but also my roots and a little bit of that family support that I have, which was really fun it. For me, it was fun.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
If we want to be really honest—now I’m thinking about it that I didn’t invent anything. My mother is an artist, and she is a survivor of the holocaust. I wish you could interview Safta. Because my mother always say, when she talks about her grandchildren and great-grandchildren, she say, “Every child is different. Every child has his own personality,” and since they are babies she say, “You see, this is him. One is louder and one is quieter, and one—“Everybody is different. You cannot compare children and siblings. You cannot compare nobody. Everybody is a creation. Everybody is a piece of art, and this this comes from my Ima and if we go back my Safta was a big hero in the holocaust, and she was so creative in the way that she escaped from the Nazi. It’s another episode perhaps for your Yom Hashoa (Holocaust Memorial Day).
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
If anybody wants, you can look in the YouTube channel. I have Safta’s story. The way she tells it to the—I think it was the fourth graders—when my daughter was in fourth grade—
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
In Hebrew.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yeah, it’s in Hebrew, but now my daughter is 14. It’s really fun to go back, listen, and see. It’s on a really nice, easy level.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Yeah, yeah. The creativity how to survive the Nazi as a Jew, how to keep your Jewish identity with a child that is four years old, that was my mother, and also how to trick all the system to stay alive. Unbelievable. You see, Bat-Chen, we are made from this woman. We have to respect the beads before us in the chain.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yes, the whole chain. It’s a whole chain, people. One of the things that I work with my clients is to find their why and the deepest why because when you really know why you’re doing something then nothing else is going to stand up to that. “Oh, but I’m scared of what people are going to think really.” Really? That’s not going to be strong enough to stop you. So sweet, one of my clients said my like, “Why, why, why?” We say why a lot of times until we finally get to the deep one is that I want to continue the chain, and I said “That’s amazing because that’s a real why that nothing else can stand up to it.” If you want to continue the chain and you want to pass on everything that has been passed on to you, you’re going to find a way to do it. Any fear of social media, any fear of technology, or any fear of anything is not going to stand up to that because it’s so strong.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
And to be fair with the other part of my family, my other grandmother was a teacher. She was born in Iraq in Baghdad. Her name was Naomi Shochet, Ninio after when she got married and she was a teacher in Morocco. She drove a car. I’m talking about the 50s. She was a strong lady. Very educated. Since I was little my name was Naomi, after her, and I think that that’s the reason that I am a teacher—one of the major reasons that Safta Naomi was a teacher. So, you see we are part of our history.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yeah, and I think it’s really cool by the way I don’t know if you guys caught that but my mother has a Naomi Gez that is also named after her. That’s her granddaughter, which I think is so cool. Isn’t that epic to have a grandchild named after you? While you’re alive? Yes, the Sefaradim (Jews from sefaradi background) do that. I think that’s awesome.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Yes, my mother is Ashkenazi, and when she heard that my granddaughter is a Naomi Gez, she told me, “Oh, Naomi. You Sfaradim—so intelligent to give the Nachat when you are alive.” [Laughs] It was very funny because I never knew if I am Sfaradi or Ashkenazi, my father is Sfarad, my mother is Ashkenaz. I never knew and I got married with a Sfaradi. So always I said, “I’m Chetzi-Chetzi. I’m half and half.” Cafe olé. Now when my son gave my name I said, “Oh, okay. Now I enter to the history. I have to be a role model.” I am now Safta, so I took my life seriously now.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Oh yeah, things like these will do that to you. [Laughs] Yeah, it makes life so much easier when you can name after people who are alive. Yeah, thank God. By the way, we were talking about my grandmother before. She was always the first one to buy anything I made. I was a graphic designer for the first 15 years before I became a coach. Anything, when I was in school and I made some project, she would say, “Oh, how much is it? I have to have this in my house,” and she had a whole collection of all of my art stuff. It’s amazing. It really is. It’s just absolutely amazing that she was able to do something that nobody else was able to do, which is give the confidence in the making, in the art—you have all this imposter syndrome like, “What do you mean? I’m just a student. I don’t know what I’m doing,” and then somebody goes and puts money down, and says, “Oh, this is worth it. This is valuable.” If you can do that for someone, do it because it’s so powerful. It really builds you up. So, just wanted to give some credit there because I really do appreciate that.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Can I give some encouragement to the people in the time of corona? I feel that I’m the cheerleader that—“Yeah! Go! Everything is good.” When I was little, my father always told me the story of the Jews in Spain with the inquisition and the marranos and all these, and now they baked Matzah in the basement so the church will never know. I was like, “Oh, yeah. What a situation.” Like a little girl—I couldn’t believe that it’s so hard to be a Jew because I grew up in Israel. Everything is Yoffi (great!), Sameach (happy). Baruch HaShem. On the other side, my mother is [a] survivor of the holocaust. I saw my grandparents. I know so many things, and always I said, “Wow, I don’t believe when I see the hand of my mother that this hand was in the holocaust.” Always I felt this body was in this place—it’s not. It’s very hard to understand that. Now came the corona, and a lot of people around me are crazy. I really I don’t believe how. It’s very hard for me to see how people are desperate and so not happy. I say, “Of course, of course. Everybody suffer[s].” I’m not talking about the people that suffer. God forbid. God forbid. I’m not talking about this—people die, people are sick, people lose their job, all this. Of course, of course. It’s very, very difficult but I’m talking about my friends around me, people around me that take it in my eyes too, too, too far because we are not in a war. Nobody wants to come to our house, to kick us, and to kill us. There is food. There is electricity. There is water. There is shelter. There is family—
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
And there is there is Zoom.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
There is Zoom. That it’s a big thing, yes. I was talking to my friend, and I told her my grandparents, like six years of the world, didn’t know what’s going on with their families in Russia and Ukraine. Terrible things were because of the disconnection. You’re right, Bat-Chen. We are so lucky we have connection. We can be almost on the moon and to talk live with our family and friends. So, I say, “Okay, it’s not inquisition. It’s not holocaust. We will do good.”
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
I think that brings us back full circle in the beginning, where you said you were using art in order to show yourself that you were resilient, that you have the strength to get up, and to be able to really do something with this—take action towards something and not be stuck in the past. I think that really brings us back sort of to tie it all together—how important it is for us to find something that fills us up, especially during the time that there’s so much stress, there’s so much worry, and there’s so much instability. It’s really important for you to find things that fill you up, make you feel safe.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
And more than that, when you have to do the beading, you have to choose the right bead from all the beads that you have. When you do that, believe me you cannot think about your problems because you have to choose now a color, the shape, and to match them. For two hours—three hours, you are out of this world. You are just in a different world and this is the beauty of that. I must tell you that my mother told me always when I was a little girl and then bigger—always she told me, “It’s not so smart to believe in God when everything is okay. It’s smart to believe in God when everything is not okay.” So, I took it and when you are down, it gives you power.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Someone on Facebook asked, “How do you have so much faith in such difficult times?” and everybody gave their own answers in the comments. One of the things I said is when you’ve been practicing when it was good and easy, then your muscles are strong and you can pick up that weight when it’s heavy, but if you’re just starting when it’s heavy, then you’re going to feel very overwhelmed by how do you guys have the strength to pick this up. It’s because some people have been practicing and some people haven’t, and that doesn’t mean that this isn’t a good time to start because how they say it’s either one day or day one—so take it and start doing something that will move you forward in the right direction. Definitely, don’t leave it. “Oh, it’s too bad. It’s too late now. I guess I’m done.” No. It’s always day one if you want to start something. Always, always worth starting, but know that it’s really important to be able to grow your strength even when things are easy or even when things are good.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
It’s funny when I had homework and I didn’t know how to do them, I was so frustrated as a child. I remember my mother, especially in math, she used to say, “Okay, now let’s say that it’s a game. It’s not homework. It’s a game,” and I tried to look and because I didn’t have the stress suddenly, I understood much better. I did much better and now with the Zoom—suddenly, boom they closed the school last year. Can you imagine a teacher that doesn’t know even how to open a computer? What is Zoom? We didn’t know what is Zoom, and from one day to the next day, we had to give a Zoom class. Nobody knew what it is. It was like a monster that you open and will eat you. It was so scary and I told myself, “Let’s see it again,” and I began to talk in the Zoom. All my children in pajama[s], and the maid is in the behind with the vacuum cleaner. I’m talking. “We don’t hear you.” “Yes, we hear you,” and they said, “Okay, Yeladim (children), it’s like a game,” and everybody was relaxed. Today, I am the queen of the Zoom. I love it. I make beautiful slideshows and everything, but that’s life. It’s beautiful. Every day, something new.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yeah, and I think you can only get to the part where you’re the queen of anything if you’re willing to be messy, and if you’re willing to just get in there.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Don’t be afraid to do mistakes. Mistakes are beautiful.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yeah. Did you ever think of doing your workshops online?
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Yeah, I thought about it.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
What do you guys think about doing a Zoom meetup where everybody buys their own fimo or polymer clay and we work together? Oh, I think that would be so much fun.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
I thought perhaps to make some kits to sell—to send kit ready, and then we can work together.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Let’s make all these pre-prepared kits. I think it would be so much fun.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
I agree. It’ll be my pleasure. If they don’t have time before Passover, and I say Davka (on purpose) before Passover. Leave the refrigerator for two hours and leave all the cleaning and come to make jewelry. You will see you will get power and motivation to work eight hours and you will forget yourself. It’s not normal. Yesterday, I work[ed] like five hours after making some art. It’s cleaning your Neshama. It’s cleaning your soul. It’s cleaning your brain. You don’t think about anything. You have to decide what color to pick, what shape, and suddenly you’re clean.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yeah. In coach language we call that being in the present.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
That’s so true. By the way, the lady that asked me about teaching children—if a child is playing LEGO under his desk, I know that he’s listening. I will never come and take him this. I know that he’s listening. Okay, if he’s a good student, I mean. If somebody has the other problems because I had a student that everybody was complaining. I told the mother in the parents-teacher meeting, “Your son will be an architect or an engineer,” and now he’s very big. She tells me every time she see[s] me in the street, “You remember what you said about my son?” Because that’s the way he concentrate[s]. I cannot. No, I cannot.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yeah, we all can’t. I just wanna take that a little bit to the next level. Children are amazing and their brains are developing. They have all of that ability to be present, to play, and to have fun. Don’t forget that neuroplasticity is a real thing. You can be 60 years old and still be developing, having fun, and creating new connections in your brain just by doing these things. Now, science is backing it all up because it’s so true. You don’t have to be a kid in order to be in that state of mind and in that creative mode. The more creativity you do and the more you’re able to lean into that, the more you’re going to be really growing, even in an older stage in life.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
The soul doesn’t have age, so a child, the baby has soul as we have. So that’s the reason we have to respect, to be very flexible, to accept, and first of all, to learn the child. To know who is the child, who is the Neshama that we have.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
It’s really good advice because it reminds us that we don’t know any better. We’re just here to lead and to show them the way.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Children are so smart and so special. Just because they are little doesn’t say that they they have big spirit. When you talk about believing in God, and about stories from Parachat Shavua, how they react, and what they say, it’s amazing how good they are.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
We ran out of time, and I want to respect all of you. Me and my mother can talk here for hours, and I’m sure that you guys can sit, listen, and ask questions, and we can have back and forth conversations till tomorrow, but we have to go. If you guys want to check out my mother’s beautiful art, it’s Art for Me by Naomi.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
In the YouTube—
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
And also, on Instagram I see you. So, we’re proud, we’re proud. You know how the parents are proud? Now the generations have turned. The children are trying to get their parents into technology, so it’s really fun.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
I can teach you many things on the computer, Bat-Chen.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
I know, I know. There are things there that I don’t even want to know.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
We made a Kahoot.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
So fun, so fun.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Yeah, it’s nice to learn. Every age, you have to learn, and never underestimate yourself.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
Yes. So thank you so much to my mother for being here today. This was so lovely. So much fun. I’m so glad that we got to do this.
REBBETZIN NAOMI GEZ
Thank you for having me. I think that it was a very nice thing. It’s a big honor for me.
REBBETZIN BAT-CHEN GROSSMAN
It was a fun experience, and if you guys want to know more, I am on Facebook, on Instagram. My mother is on Facebook and Instagram we are here for you so don’t hesitate to reach out. And that’s it! Thank you for listening to the very end. I would love if you can leave a review and subscribe to the podcast. Those are things that tell the algorithm, this is a good podcast and make sure to suggest it to others. Wouldn’t it be amazing if more people became more connected for real? And now, take a moment and think of someone who might benefit from this episode. Can you share it with them? I am Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman from connectedforreal.com. Thank you so much for listening, and don’t forget, you can be connected for real.