188. The Maimonides Approach to Healthy Living

Transcript:

 Welcome to the Connected For Real podcast. I’m Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman, a marriage coach for women in business. And my mission is to bring God’s presence into your life, into your marriage and into your business. Let’s get started. 

 And we are  live. Welcome everyone to the Connected for Real podcast. I’m Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman, and today with me is Remi. Introduce yourself. I hope I didn’t mess up your name. Go for it. Yeah, no, you did incredible. Thank you for having me. My name is Remi. Haik Weinberg, and I am a health and wellness expert, and I’ve been doing this work for over a decade.

I’m helping women own their worth and get into their power, embrace their power through spirituality, self-love, healthy habits, personal growth, all the good things that help women leave  unapologetically free in their skin.  Okay. And that’s amazing. We’re gonna get more specific than that in just a second.

Don’t worry, you guys.  Today’s topic is health and you, and you guys know there are four pillars around here. God, marriage, business, and you. Those are my four pillars that I focus on, and every month we focus on a different topic. So this month is the month of health. We spoke about health and God, it was amazing.

If you didn’t listen to it, go back and listen. It was really good. It was one of my favorite one of my favorite things. Anyway today we’re talking about health and you, and specifically we wanted to talk about how you can tap into the old  ancient secrets and, you know, sort of, the things that the Rambam brings, right?

This one of your specialties.  All of the things that  we authentically have before it became like cool, right?  And just in general, how you could be your health yourself, how you can see health in a different way so that you don’t have to make it as hard or as complicated and just let it flow.

That’s what we’re all about here. So I don’t do overwhelm and I want you guys to know we’re not gonna give you more work. Right. So let’s talk about that a little bit. How did you get into the Rambam’s health regimens and knowledge and all that stuff? Yeah. I also love keeping it simple.

So we got this  so you know how there’s a saying that your pain is your calling? So that’s how it started for me in this whole health and wellness world.  I grew up in the nineties and back then there was the fashion TV and TV shows and all these things.

Grew up in Israel  and, and started seeing the world in terms of the beauty standards. And then how do I feel about what I eat and how do I feel about my body? And I look in the mirror, do I like it? I did not like it for years, but I worked on it.  And also I, I grew up in a household that was very.

Healthy to, to a point. It didn’t start that way. My mom was overweight. And then when I was around 12 years old she started a, just a healthy lifestyle. And before that, it was always the diets, right? And there was always the diet, the cabbage diet, the soup diet. I, I tried all of them. Little secret.

They’re not working. What really worked for her and for hundreds  of people is really the, the, the habits, right? So I started questioning that. And then when there was the time for me to go to school, I went to the Edman College in Israel. Which there I became a naturopath studied four years.

And in those classes of nutrition natural health, they kept on referring, the professors kept on referring to Rambam Maimonides. Mm-hmm. And they kept on referring to his work and, and um, herbology and everything he said about chewing your food slowly and we’ll get into the more details, but all those things that he said around 800, 900 years ago.

So I was very fascinated by him and just really from the point of, Hey, actually now the gut health situation you know, everybody’s talking about gut health, it became like a trend. But hey, actually there’s a rabbi that was talking about it 900 years ago. He did not have to technology and he

talked about it. So I was just very fascinated. And that, that’s how I think let’s, let’s just establish that the Rambam is a fascinating character. Okay? It was Rabbi and doctor. He had a full day. You asking me like how I am getting anything done? Like, man,  I don’t know how he got anything done. He has like, it’s amazing.

Anyway, so Yeah, go ahead. We’re all fascinated.  Yeah. His, you know what  I love the fact that you, that you mentioned that because his story, even his life story,  let alone like his professional life, but his life story.  It’s remarkable. He flea, his family needed to flee about three, four, or maybe even five times and, and move countries and starting over.

He lost his brother that he loved so much. When he was 40, he was bad sick. Or for a year, a full year he was depressed. So it is, it is just so fascinating to see that from all those struggles and everything that he needed to overcome. And I know this is not the health part, but it’s, it’s mental health as well, right.

Because he  was able to overcome that. Right. And, and that’s when he  became a, a a renowned doctor. That’s when the sultan of Egypt  requested him to become his own private doctor. And after he did that with the Egyptian saltan, he continued seeing patients. Right, right.

So you’re you’re saying that yeah, people, people would, he, the Rambam has his daily routine written down and it’s crazy. Okay. It’s like, and I woke up and I went to the Sul and I came back and there was a line at the door and I saw every single one. And then I ate something and, you know, went to sleep for two hours so I can then get up again.

And it’s like, oh my gosh, how do you live? Right. And, and you said his story, I think, wasn’t he also an orphan from a young age? He didn’t have a mother. Yes. So his mom actually passed away in birth. Right. At birth, yeah. So, and, and then his, his father remarried to another woman. And then he had his brother David.

Right. And David was younger than him. And that’s.  Kind of the story that they came  from cord Bass, Spain to Morocco, to Israel in aco to Morocco, again to Egypt. It was a whole story. So yeah, he went through a lot. Yeah.  Yeah. And you know what? I think it’s important for us. I think on purpose, my, my, my intuition is like, yeah, let’s just recognize him first because, you know, there’s all these people sitting on fancy chairs doing some fancy research telling us some fancy thing and like meanwhile, or like you have all these doctors who are telling you to eat right and telling you to sleep, right.

But they themselves are completely not in alignment with what they’re saying. They’re going through their own stuff. Like there’s such a disconnect between the advice that we get from professionals and then the life that they’re actually living that I wanna take the moment to really. I recognize that this is coming from a person who is living real life and going through real struggles and experiencing real things.

So when we’re looking at our own lives going, I don’t think I could do this. Like, this doesn’t make any sense. It’s like, okay,  but it’s, you know, but maybe it’s still doable, or maybe we can find a way. Right. It’s like, open yourself up to receive that too.  I love that. I love, I love that. And also one thing that I love the most about him, I, I, I, I truly am a big fan of his.

But one thing that I really love about him and align so well with me, what I, what you also just said we’re keeping it simple. And he was very simple.  He was a doctor, he was a rabbi, he was a philosopher, all those things. But he kept things very simple and that’s how he. Approached health, and that’s how he taught and that’s how he approached his patients.

Everything was very.  I, I, maybe simple is not the right word. Maybe it’s, it’s more about, yeah, sorry. It was simple. It wasn’t maybe easy, but he made it easy for them  to implement them in their lives. So that’s really remarkable. I just love how you can take a big topic, a big concept, and as we, you mentioned too, you know, there are all these scientists and all these people telling us, oh, eat this and then this and it, it seems so complicated, but hey, we got this guy, this amazing rabbi that was saying, no, you know what, maybe just drink a little bit, you know, maybe don’t drink before you eat.

Maybe. Do you know those small things? It’s like, oh, I can do this. This is easy, right?  Yeah. Okay. First all, I just wanted to recognize that we have a live listener who’s sent us a comment, which I’m so happy about. ’cause if you guys know, I do these live on purpose so that we can have this interaction. So thank you so much.

She says, loving this. So interesting. So, yes, I agree, and I’m so happy it’s resonating. Let’s get practical. What are the main things that the Ram Baum Maimonides says to do for our health, and how can we implement it into our everyday life? Mother, wife, business owner, busy, you know, hectic. Life is going all over the place.

Okay. Yeah, let’s do this. Okay. So first of all, also thank you. Inba. Inba is also a friend of mine, so I’m happy she’s here. Okay.  So the Rambam looked at health from a holistic perspective, meaning we have a body,  we have a soul, and we have a mind, and they’re all connected, right?

And from that perspective, the things that he taught us mostly the key element, in fact that it was in his whole approach was optimizing the digestive system. He was talking a lot about the digestive system from the understanding that the digestive system is really the biggest system that makes everything else move around and work in our bodies, right?

So if we’re eating things that are not easy for us to digest, we’ll feel bloated, we’ll feel tired, we’ll have a headache, we’ll have a migraine, and la la la la la the list goes on, right? So that’s first and foremost important to know about his approach. And now the things that he was talking about. He was talking about should we go just into the tips of his approach?

Yeah, sure. Go for it. Okay. Okay. Yeah. So he was talking about, for example, chewing your food slowly.  Being mindful about the way you chew your food. And of course, nowadays, modern days, we are all with our phones, with our computers, with our emails, with whatever. And we’re like, you know, and especially in the United States, God bless America everything is really fast around here, right?

And we’re just kind of shoving food into our systems. He was talking about, Hey, you know what, actually, if you eat really, really fast, you don’t give your digestive system to go through the process of really breaking down the food. So just before, I’m gonna continue with this, I just wanna make this clear.

Digestive system is really, really big, okay? And it starts from our.  Mouth. It starts from the saliva breaking the food. It starts from the saliva where we have enzymes that are breaking the food. It starts from chewing the mechanical act of chewing. Then goes down to the stomach.

Now, in the stomach there’s another digestive process that  the stomach acid is breaking down the food that enters. Okay? Then it goes down to the bowel. And then we have a really interesting process over there where basically the majority of the breaking down happens at this somewhere at the end of the stomach process and into the bowels, right?

So for example, chewing slowly, if we’re not chewing slowly, if we’re not being mindful about it, let’s say I shove in like some chunks of  a meal, a donut, okay? I dunno, a donut, but let’s say I’m eating a donut. If I’m shoving it.  I don’t remember when was the last time I ate a donut. Maybe it’s a si.

Maybe I need to eat a donut now. I dunno. But we’ll go, wait, wait one second. Hanukkah passed. You did not, you did not eat a donut. Hanukkah.   So let’s say I’m shoving, right? I’m shoving the food in without having the, first of all, again, we said the saliva, the enzymes there that are breaking down the food.

Then we have the mechanical system, the, the mechanical work of the teeth. Then what happens is like chunks of food go into the stomach. Let’s say, let’s take another example. If I eat a really, really big meal, and of course we all know those meals and it’s okay once in a while to have them where, you know, we sit in a table.

It could be Shabbat dinner, I don’t know, but maybe holidays where we need to open up, you know, to kind of sit like, you know, like we ate a lot. What happens there if we do it on a. On a daily basis. For example the, the stomach acid and the enzymes in it cannot reach the whole meal. And then the breaking down of the food, again, we talked about starting from here, from the mouth, but the breaking down of the food will be incomplete.

It, it will not happen fully. And then what happens from the food that we just ate, we might not get the right nutrients ’cause the system didn’t have enough time to break it down. Then second thing that could happen when we’re fully bloated, and that’s the second thing that, the second tip that my monice talked about, to make sure that you eat up until 75% of your meal.

I’ll explain this, it sounds weird, I’ll explain it. It’s very simple. He was talking about it in a way that he called it pleasant satiety.  So pleasant satiety really means that we eat and we eat until a point that we feel like, you know what? I can eat another quarter of this meal, right? So if I have a big, big plate, preferably prepare the plate to be a little less than that.

But if I have a big meal and then I feel so bloated, it’s not pleasant, satiety, I’m not feeling pleasant, I’m like, oh yeah, maybe it was great to eat this, but, hmm, now I’m feeling bloated. I’m feel, so what happens when this occurs? And, and we do it on a regular basis.  We talk about then issues like bloating, like gas, like and again, once the stomach  is so full, we have other inner organs that the stomach is pushing against, right?

So maybe we’re even talking about shortened breath. Literally because of a big meal. It sounds funny, right? Some people will, will start sweating, will start have like you know, heart palpitations, like will feel very  will just feel it in their overall body. So it’s interesting that that the digestive system really have this effect.

So again, we talked about, I’m kinda bringing it back home. So we talked about chewing chewing slowly, being mindful about chewing. Then we talked about the second thing was pleasant satiety to practice, pleasant satiety. And my biggest tip on this if you’ve never tried it before, you have no idea what I’m talking about.

Try one meal a week, take it super easy. Like, we’re good. No need to, you know, try one meal a week to see how you feel, and then move on gradually, then move on to one meal a day.  Then see how that feels. And most of the times what happens as well. And this is also another thing that Maimonides were ta was talking about.

What happens then? We become a little more mindful about what we’re putting inside our bodies and that now we’re stepping into the mindfulness movement and the mindful eating movement and all these type of things. And he was talking about these things before with saying, oh hey, practice pleasant satiety.

Eat a little less, eat 75%.  Another point, third point that he was talking about was to eat your last meal about three to four hours before you go to bed. And this is something that if you are in the diet world, if you ever tried any diet, you probably heard and yeah, I see rabbits. And you, you, you nod.

 ’cause you heard that before.  I, I think it’s just intuitive when you eat and then lie down right away, your body is like,  you know, like, not, not the feeling you wanna be having. So I, I definitely have heard of this and, you know, experience both ways so I can testify.  Yeah. And, and so, so he was talking about that in a way  from the understanding of,  okay, so when we go to sleep,   our bodies don’t, don’t go to sleep.

The everything’s working, the hormones are moving from here to there. The kidneys are cleaning up, the liver’s, cleaning up, this happens insulin. All those things are happening while we’re sleeping. And that’s why it’s also good to to sleep very well. I’ll get there in a second. Because we wanna get the body to do all the things.

It needs to do. Right. So one thing to understand it a little more  and drive it home is think about,  it’s a great story. I heard it somewhere. It’s not mine, but it’s a great story. So think about a guy that walks around the streets of Jerusalem, beautiful Jerusalem in the evening.

He walks around and  somebody hands him a flyer of a new restaurant, new restaurant is opening up around the city. And he is new in the city. He’s kind of checking out things. And then he goes to his hotel, Airbnb or whatever. And then he feels like, he’s like, oh, maybe I can get like a carrot juice or something nice, or just something refreshing.

Little does he know that this restaurant, right, he think he thinks about checking this out. The restaurant is closing at 10:00 PM.  Now he sees the flyer around nine 30 and he is like, oh they have carrot juice. Why don’t I go there and try it out? Right. So he starts going there, walking there. In the meantime, he doesn’t know that the restaurant staff, if you ever worked in restaurants, I don’t know if you have, but if you have ever worked in a restaurant or event planning or things like that if you close at 10:00 PM and you have no clients around nine 40, you start cleaning up.

You know, you start picking up the tables, you start all the, you know, all the machines, the coffee machine, you start turning it off the air conditioned, like all these type of things that you’re like, well, nobody’s gonna show up. So this guy, right, he shows up and he sees that, but then is in his mind, he thinks, oh, I just want a carrot juice. So it’s really small, right? It sounds like very tiny and small. But for them, for the restaurant staff to give him, to provide him the carrot juice they need to open up the lights again. They need to open up the AC again. They need to open up the machine again. They need to turn on the things like it’s such a big thing that’s happening behind the scenes.

Same thing happens when we eat right before we go to bed. Our bodies are already getting ready for the night, right? For the night’s sleep, and are just like, okay, you know what? I’m, nothing’s happening. I’m good. So for all the people who are listening or watching and have this craving to, a lot of people tell me that, a lot of, a lot of women tell me that, that after a very long day, and I was, myself included.

Okay, nobody’s uh, perfect.  So.  A lot of women have this after a big day, kind of like retiring, you know, in front of the TV and then having some snacks, and then all of a sudden they feel like, oh, maybe I’ll have some chocolate and maybe I have this, and oh, it’s not that bad. It’s not that bad. But again, think about this guy with the restaurant.

Your body needs to do all these things for you to have this tiny little chocolate. So how about having the chocolate  tomorrow, even like around, you know, another meal.  So that’s another thing that my mind you talked about around eating too late. Don’t eat too late. Eat around three to four hours before you go to bed.

Yeah. So let’s.  Let’s, let’s continue with if you have specific questions. Let’s, because I feel like I’m just blabbering. Yeah, yeah. No. Okay, so I’m loving this.  When you said the digestive system is so great, I was thinking even beyond the actual digestive system, your eyes, your brain, you’d look at your food right away, your brain gets, you know, started.

Right? Just like the guy is coming. So the machine is starting to like, you know, prepare. Like when you open up the restaurant, even if there are no people, you already know, people are coming. So you’re cutting up vegetables, you’re preparing the sauces, you’re preparing the things, you know that you’re going to have to be open for service.

Your brain is the same thing. Your eyes see food right away. Your brain turns on, your saliva is gonna start your right. Like even before the food arrives, you’ve already opened the, you know, the restaurant, whatever it is, the process has begun and I think that. Is just a really great hack for people who don’t really like the whole mindful thing and don’t know how to tap into it.

And I don’t know what, like you were saying, we scroll, we’re on email, we’re, you know, not really focused.  Just look at your food,  right? Like even if one time a meal or one meal a year, I don’t care, whatever it is for you, if you just look at the food you’re eating, and it doesn’t have to be every single bite, like one bite every meal.

Just one bite. Pick it up, look at it. Look at the colors, look at the shapes, look at the textures. You know, decide what is your favorite thing on the plate that you wanna be tasting first. Whatever it is. Like really give the process. Respect,  allow your body to really work for you and not against you. Just looking at your food one time a meal is, is just gonna completely blow you away from everything that’s been happening.

And you know, I, I was a graphic designer for 15 years. I totally know about eating in front of the computer because you have to. It’s just part of, part of how it works. You eat lunch at the computer and you scrolling and you’re doing things and whatever.  I’ve gotten so much better at this. You guys is crazy.

I’ve even been challenged by a friend of mine who just said randomly. And I, I took it as a challenge, which happens a lot. I will pick up challenges on my own, but like she said, what if you were sitting down to eat with God? Mm. Like how would, how would you eat if you were sitting down with God? And so I sat myself down and I really went through as much as I could concentrating on if I had God right here, would I be looking at anything else?

No. I’d be  in my meal having maybe like a conversation, you know, just sort of like chewing over whatever I’m thinking about. Like, I was so present. I think that was like one time, once in a lifetime experience people is so, yeah. She says, wow. It was so cool. It was so cool.  Yeah.  And,  and it’s just one of those, like,  I get it, like, I don’t know if I could do it every day.

I don’t know if, but it’s just, you only have to taste it once to understand, oh, I’m not doing this whole like, computer anymore. Right.  I sometimes do, but  rarely because now I will actually sit myself down with my breakfast and just be, I don’t even like, you know, I used to like, take notes or like things I need to do today or whatever.

Like, no, I’m like very, and, and I sit myself by the window. So like I have this sun in my back and I’m like, I feel like I’m in a restaurant just with like the sun  and my meal and like, and I’m all alone because I took the kids to school and everybody’s already out of the house and whatever it is. And like, I have my schedule, so I also won’t eat before I pray.

So I’m like, you know, it’s like this is the time. And like my body has gotten so into that, like, anyway, I totally went on a tangent, but I think it was to illustrate  what you were teaching, that  you don’t have to completely transform your life. You don’t have to go from, you know, scrolling and eating to like, okay, now I’m super mindful and I’m sitting with God every day.

No, it’s like, try things once. Allow yourself to experiment, to play, to find, to just look at your food, to choose whatever bite you want to eat first, right? Like sometimes, you know, people are like all into plating their food and I’m like, I don’t have time for that, but maybe I’ll plate my first bite. You know, it’s like I’ll take with my fork, like the colors I like and I’ll try to see how I can make it fun just for that one bite.

You know?  There’s so much going on behind the scenes that I really, I, I totally connect with what you’re saying. Let’s get into sleep. ’cause I really wanna know a lot  about that. Yeah. Well first let me just say, I love what you said about the meal and that you’re doing it by the window and taking time for yourself, because that’s another thing that I actually now started implementing.

Usually lunchtime is kind of my me time. So I actually look at it from a perspective of self-care. Self-care, literally self-care of  putting my phone away, not scrolling, not because I used to, you know, just like, oh yeah, I need to text this person and my clients and this people, and, you know, all those things.

But I’m like, hold on. You know, it’s from the understanding that if I will not fill up my cup, hey,  I will not be able to give anybody anything, right? So even if it’s just lunch, it’s one meal and you said like one meal a week. Like, okay, you know what, I’m gonna fill my cup up.

So yeah, so that, that’s about that. That’s really. In a perspective of self-care even. And I love the idea of thinking that God is sitting with me. I’m gonna try it on my next meal. So I’ll, I’ll report, I’ll tell you. Yes, of course.  Yeah. I’ll okay, so sleep. Yeah, so Maimonides was talking about sleep.

 He was talking about really having a good deep night’s sleep. And I know that sleep, a lot of people talk about the waves and the levels of sleep. And nowadays you have all these apps and all those rings and all those technology stuff that can help you do that, which is great. And if you love that, go for it.

One thing  that Maimonides was talking about is really sleep from the perspective of regenerating, helping your body regenerate everything else that’s working, right? Like we never think about, oh, how does my hair grow? But well, if you cover your hair, maybe you can look at your nails, your, your fingernails.

How does, how, how do they grow? Oh, guess what? When you sleep better, they might grow better.  Your skin will look better. So, so sleep affects  everything, in our system, everything in our wellbeing. Obviously mental health is completely affected by our sleep. So a lot of things that we can do today to sleep better.

One thing that I full wholeheartedly recommend, and I know that it’s hard for some people, I. Is to put your phone away in a different room  than your bedroom.  And if you have alarms, please buy, like, get like this. Even like the tiniest, I don’t know, $10 clock to set an alarm on. Like, seriously when you put your phone away.

’cause there’s this tendency, we’re, we’re human beings, right? If it’s there, you’re gonna use it. Come on. Even if you’re lying down and you can’t see it, you notice it’s there. You’re gonna scroll, you’re gonna look, you’re gonna, oh, maybe, oh, you know what? I forgot to tell this person. Oh, I forgot to la la la la.

All of a sudden one hour goes by, you were planning to go to bed at like 9:00 PM now it’s 1130 or whatever, right? So that’s the biggest thing that can change and help you sleep because obviously we know that the screen the light from the screen is not good for our eyes, for our minds, for our brains, all these things.

And also then it affects our sleep. So that’s one thing that I totally recommend to try and again. Everything we’re saying here, I love   to try it once.  Try it one time. If it doesn’t work for you, it doesn’t work for you. Like all good, you know, best for you, right? So try it once maybe tonight. 

Try to just aim to put your phone away. Another thing about sleep that can really help us sleep better is again, we talked earlier about not having meals before you go to bed. Having some kind of warm drink. If it’s tea, if it’s just really warm water with nothing, preferably not lemon before you go to bed with hot water because it kind of opens up the system.

Hot lemon water, we all heard about it in the morning. The reason being is it pushes the liver to work and it pushes all the  system to start working. So we don’t wanna do that at night. It’s the opposite. So at night, something that is a little warming, which is, and I’m gonna jump into it in a second.

Maimonides was also talking about cooling and warming foods that we also know from the Chinese medicine. But really the understanding that our digestive system, the temperature inside our body is so hot. Like it’s warm, it’s really hot. So when we have something cold to drink, it shocks the system a little bit.

So if we’re winding down and we’re about to go to sleep, something that is warm, it’s kind of like cozy. It’s kind of like putting on a blanket, but from inside, if that makes sense.  I love that you said hot water. You know, the whole  transition of my, hot drinks. I have to tell you, this is so funny.

So I used to drink hot tea with like two tablespoons of sugar and the spoons, not tablespoons teaspoons, but the spoons were pregnant. Okay? There’s a lot of sugar in there. So this was what I, you know, like teenagers, this is what we set down to drink together, whatever. And. I was like, hot, you know, like dark tea with two spoons of sugar and, and, and that was my thing.

And I was like, Ugh, I can’t, and without the sugar, it’s disgusting, right? And like, anyway, so  I was, you know, this mature teenager, I’m like, okay, I gotta cut down the sugars. Probably not good for me. So I started lowering the amount. So instead of pregnant spoons, I put flat spoons. And then I went to one and a half, and then I went to one and a quarter and I started getting used to it, but I was like, ah, well I’ll just stay here for a while.

And eventually I, I realized I just don’t like the taste of tea without the sugar. And my sister said, why don’t you just not put tea?  Then you won’t have to put the sugar. And I was like, so then it’s just water. They’re like, yeah. So  I tried it and I’m like, I love this. I love hot water. Like now my go-to is hot water.

If I add like Louisa or Nana or something in the hot water, it’s like, that’s an upgrade. But like hot water is so great. So if you guys have never tried it before, it is so fun. So fun.  Absolutely. I love this. It’s kind of like putting on a blanket, but from the inside it’s like you’re blanketing your inner organs.

Like why not? And actually it reminds me of a story about and I’ll get into the warming and cooling foods in a second, but it reminds me a story of how to change habits and how to kinda gradually get into healthy habits. ’cause I feel like a lot of the times, and it’s probably not every woman I worked with but most women I hear always say, I have no willpower.

I have no willpower. Let’s say they wanna lose weight, let’s say they want to get into fitness, whatever the case may be. I hear it constantly. I don’t have willpower. I cannot, you know, so the story is I had, one of my clients came to me at the beginning. She wanted to go into fitness. She wanted to start a fitness routine.

And she was like, I know it’s healthy for me. I know I need to do that, la la la great. But she was like,  I just think about going into a gym for an hour. I I, I’m starting to like, I’m, I’m losing it, right? And and the way we started working was like, you know what? How about you’ll have your yoga mat and maybe a dumbbell or two just lying around your living room.

Just, let’s see, and let’s start with five minutes a day that you’re gonna do something. And we started from a perspective of her commitment to herself was five minutes  a day of movement. It didn’t matter which one, like whatever, even if she didn’t have dumbbells at the beginning, she bought them later on.

But she just had the mat right in her living room. And she said, okay, I’m gonna do five minutes. And she, you know, she continued to report to me and then at one point she was like, you know what? I want more than five minutes. You know what I wanna, so, you know, it, it kind of became gradually that all of a sudden she’s like working out 30 minutes a day, sometimes 45 minutes.

Sometimes she goes to the gym, something that she hated. So it’s just so interesting  to understand that warrior start simple. Like, it’s okay. Start every, you know, step by step.  I have to tell you guys, we are so dynamic  and we don’t give ourselves enough credit.  First of all, we think that this is how I am, so this is how I’m always going to be, which is such a lie.

Such a lie.  We think that we need to be there already, which is also such a lie because nobody ever wakes up one day and is like, you know what, from now on, I am a public speaker. You know? It’s like, no, nobody, nobody. I have to tell you about myself. I used to be afraid of speaking in public so much so that when I was told I had to give dvar Torah like a, a short Torah  class, like 10 minutes to my class in high school. 

I  stressed over it for like probably a week and prepared something with the help of my father, which I then had to say in public. And as I’m speaking in public, I turned black. Like my, my eyes just could not see anymore. My hands started shaking. I could not get words out of my mouth. And I remember this moment so clearly, like I can never speak in public.

It will never help. I can, I am a lost case in public speaking. I, I just knew I can talk to my friends. I can be friendly, I can welcome new people in. Like, I am such a people person. But the second you put me on the spot and I have to actually present, I done No Uhuh, not me. Goodbye. And I’m telling you this because I’m on a podcast and I’m the host people. 

Why? Like how in the world? Does that make sense? It does not. It does not. And it only works because one day I was willing to.  Push a tiny bit. You know how it was I was asked to speak,  I was asked to speak at a Hanukkah party and I said yes. And then I didn’t end up speaking because the speaker ended up coming and then they were like, oh, nevermind, we don’t need you.

But I stressed for an hour of, what am I going to say? ’cause the speaker’s not coming and they asked me to speak instead. So I had that whole hour of stress just of saying yes. Wow.  And it didn’t even, and that was all I needed. Like I was upset with her. I was like, she made me stress and I didn’t even get to talk.

But then I walked home and I was like, thank you God.  You taught me something really important. I could just say yes. And it’s not stressful to say yes. And so the next time I was asked, I said yes without stressing.  And then I showed up and was like, okay guys, I don’t know. Let’s do this thing. And so slowly, slowly, like baby steps, like beyond the tiniest steps. 

Here I am.  And so, like you’re saying about somebody who doesn’t wanna exercise, there’s so many things that people think about themselves. I just can’t, like you were saying, I’m just not that type. I just can’t. And the answer is, you could do anything, but only if you want it. So you get to decide, do I want this?

And if I do, then what is the tiniest little step I could do towards it? Just like,  let’s see it. 

  Hey, before we continue the episode, I want to ask you something. Are you ready to get answers from God directly, feel more in love with your husband and more supported than ever? Run the business of your dreams without having to sacrifice any other part of your life? That is exactly what my one-on-one private coaching is for, and I want to invite you, just you and me.

For a free deep dive discovery call, this is a 60 minute free call where I ask you lots of questions and we extract the three main things that are holding you back. I then put together a personalized plan for you where I create a roadmap of recommendations. With practical steps,  the call is free and so valuable in itself.

So go book yours today. Now back to the show. 

  I love this. This is such a good example. And it’s, it’s exactly that. It’s exactly that. And it’s really just asking yourself every single day,  or if you’re a planner, have a plan for every single day to do one tiny thing.

And if not, just ask yourself, what can I do today to get me closer to where I want or who I wanna be or what I want to do in the world? So I love that. I, I have to, I have to just pause you right there. I’m sorry. I have the guide to unravel overwhelm, which you guys can all download@connectedforreal.com slash guide.

The show notes will be down somewhere. I’m sure my assistant will do her best to fill this in, but I just couldn’t hold it in. This is exactly what I talk about is so awesome that  it’s so simple and in the guide to unravel overwhelm, it’s actually picking one thing for five minutes a day or 10 minutes a day and then doing it every single day.

And for a lot of my people, like you were saying, put down a mat and do five minutes. It’s like sometimes it’s just  go outside,  you know, put on shoes, go outside. That’s it. You’re done. You can check it off,  right? Or you know, unwind your mat, put it on the thing, sit on it,  you know.  That’s it.

You’re done. Check it off. And if you check off every single day. You have created a new habit  of checking off something.  Even if you did nothing but you did, your brain is starting to like get that.  And you know, like you said, you have to prepare, you have to think ahead, you have to really set up for success.

But it’s a really fun guide. So go, go download connected for real.com/guide. Okay. Sorry, go ahead. We’re back at I love it. Back to, yeah. I love it. It’s, it’s great. And okay, let me just finish up the, the warming cooling foods. Yes because it’s an interesting point. So the Chinese medicine also was talking about that as well also hundreds and thousands of years ago.

And Maimonides also brought it into his work because he understood as well that, so different foods have different temperatures and then.  One thing that he was really advocate about was that nutrition is personalized. So one thing that works for you might not work for me, might not work for the other person, the other woman across the street.

So  we wanna understand what works for us. And  part of it is really understanding that there are cooling foods in there, warming foods. So a person like me, maybe with or as well as you Rebbetzin with a bubbly personality that’s so warm and you know, kind of. All those things. Maybe for these type of people, warming foods like cinnamon, like different types of meat, maybe these type of things can actually do 

the opposite from keeping us healthy because they might be too heavy for us to digest. They might be too heavy for us to process, right? Because our temperament is already warm. So from that understanding, okay, so maybe for me, and I can speak for myself honestly, I have trouble drinking hot water. I will drink tea.

Occasionally, but I cannot drink hot water. I dunno why. Maybe something, you know, this bubbly warmth personality. I just, I, I don’t know. It doesn’t happen. Like I eat soup. I like it. But anyways so, so it’s really from the understanding of knowing your temperament, your body, and learning what works for you, right?

So that’s, that’s really the, the concept of that, that, that’s also one of the keys of Maimonides work and what he taught us to look into and, and think about. And when it comes to our health,  I love it that he is so aware of  personalization because, you know, this is one of my very big values.

In my work is that I work with every woman individually, and I create a unique roadmap for her. And we are very personalized because not everybody’s situation is the same. And something that might work for one person is definitely not gonna work for another person. And that’s okay. And also just learning to be authentic with yourself, that  you expect things to work for you because they work for other people.

But when you get really silent, you’re like, no, it just doesn’t, it doesn’t work for me. It doesn’t make me happy. It doesn’t really  jive with my personality. Right. For example, you know, because I’m a marriage coach and this is you know open book here, my husband is very, very organized and like his head, very square, very like, this is how we do things and this is a, and they’re like, and when you have to do something, what do you do?

You do it  right because you, you just do what you have to do.  And what about me? I’m like, I need to wanna do it. I need to feel like doing it. I wanna like, wanna do it. And when I don’t wanna, and I, when I don’t feel like it, I’m not gonna do it. Right. So I end up getting coaches and accountability and a lot of support to get things done because I just know that I’m, my, my personality and my nature is just like let’s do the fun thing.

You know, let’s not, let’s not do the thing I have to do which is, it’s just awareness, right? There is no shame around being a certain personality. I’m, I’m creative, I go with the flow. I’m spontaneous. I love creating new things and going after shiny objects. And I really, really appreciate when I have people around me who are able to like, focus me and help me, like stay in line and like, you know, not because they’re the ones in charge, but the, they’re really helping me stay in alignment with myself. 

So my husband doesn’t get it. He doesn’t get it. He is like, what is wrong with you that you just can’t do it right? And thank God he’s such a good husband. This is not how he says things to me. Right. Like I am, I’m exaggerating it because it’s, this is how it sounds to me in my head. And I wanna just give that, you know,  the way it sounds to you in your head is not the same as the way he says it.

Okay. He’s a very nice person, and he’s very loving and he’s very supportive, and I love him very much. And when he says things like, oh, you didn’t do the dishes, or, oh, you didn’t run the,  the other day, I turned on the washing machine without putting soap in. Okay.  I just like totally left, like whoosh. But a couple of hours later I remembered and so I was like, oh man, I think I forgot to put the soap.

So he just went and did it. He wasn’t judgmental or mean or whatever about it, but I felt bad because I knew that I just lost time and wasted water and electricity and whatever it is. But like  sometimes the way we think about things makes it harder on ourselves because we can’t just accept and  be authentic to who we are. 

So I, back to what I was saying about the Rambam. I think it’s very cool that he was aware of the fact that we’re not all the same and therefore everybody needs different things. Yes, absolutely. And and I also see, ’cause you also mentioned that with tailoring the plan and tailoring, that’s what I also love doing with clients as well.

When I work one-on-one with women, it’s very. Everybody’s so different. Right. But one thing that I noticed, ’cause  I do also sometimes group coaching  and just group environments. ’cause sometimes it’s just so nice to be around other women that go through the same things.

So I noticed that whenever we do the group calls there might be one woman that will say and share something from her experience, something from her experience with body and and, and health and all those things. And then all of a sudden there will be other four or five women that be like, oh, you know what?

My grandma told me this and I was growing up like this and this is making sense to me and this is why I’m eating this and blah, blah, blah, blah. So it’s like, so, so it’s so amazing to know that we’re so different. And because we’re so different, it actually brings up, inspiration, as you mentioned. Oh, you see other people do it, then you’re like, oh, actually it connects to my this and this and this that I do.

So, so I just love that. This is beautiful. Yeah. I love what you just said because it’s really important to hear that we’re all so unique and we all have our personal situations  and we’re also all  so similar. We’re all going through the same experiences and the same emotions and the same  internal journey.

So  no matter what the specific thing is, you can always see.  That there’s someone else experiencing the same thing. So get support, you know, get yourself surrounded by the people who get it and the people who could share and hold and be there with you because it’s so much more fun when you have other people.

By the way, this is why I have guests on my podcast, like, could you imagine if I had to sit here and talk about all these things all by myself? Like, this is so much more fun.  It’s, it is fun. Yeah. I love this.  Okay, so we talked about the digestive system, we talked about sleep, we didn’t talk about water so much.

Can we talk a little bit about the hydration? Yeah, absolutely. Okay, so we all know that it’s important to drink water, right? We all know that. I’m not gonna tell you why it’s important. It’s important, right? But one thing that a lot of us forget is to really do it, to really just drink water, right?

We’re like, oh, I need to drink water. So a few things that, that I love that help me drink more water is, first of all have it next to you. Have like either, so I have these when I’m home or I will have like those you know, those bottles just hanging around somewhere in the car, wherever. So just always have that around you.

It. Completely shift everything. ’cause you see it, you’re gonna use it, you’re gonna drink it. And the second thing is some people like it. Sometimes I love it also in summer, during summer ’cause it’s refreshing  to put some either lemon slices, lime nana mint into your water, maybe even blueberries, raspberries sometimes, all those things.

It kind of make it a little, it’s not sugar, right? You’re not gonna put the teaspoons of sugar, right? But it’s, it’s a little, it makes it a little sweet. It makes it a little different. So  you can add those things  to your water. And remember if you’re a coffee lover like I am  for each cup of coffee I am, I’m like,  for each cup of coffee.

Remember that we need to have at least two glasses of water. The reason being is coffee is great, but it also dries out our liver and we want to make sure that we hydrate it again. Okay. And one last thing that this is really my favorite and my husband is like looking at me funny. All when I do it.

To have water in a wine glass.  Water in a wine glass. If you have not tried it, please do. And tell me how you feel after. ’cause you feel like such a queen, like wine glass. Right? It feels fancy. It feels like luxurious. It’s just water, right? It, it’s, it, it’s a complete. Game changer, right? So so that one thing I, oh gosh, you just reminded me of the cutest hack that I saw somebody put water into those ice makers, like, you know, for the kids, like, you’re supposed to put juice  and like freeze it.

And they just put water and froze it and then they just handed it to their kids and they’re like, oh yeah, we’re getting ices, right? And it’s like, wow, wow. Why did we not think of this? Like, this is genius, right? So the same thing you’re saying, like it’s just water, but it’s in a wine glass and it feels so good.

You should know by the way that I had a marriage breakthrough retreat. I ran it nine times. It was really, really cool. And one of the things on day one is making a list of the things that you love and that make you happy.  And every time I ran it, I did it on myself. ’cause I, I.

You know, I do what I preach.  I try at least. And so one time it came up that I really liked drinking in glass and not in plastic. Like I love glass cups, I love glass plates and bowls, everything glass. So I said it out loud in one of my classes. And then when I spoke in someone’s house, like, I don’t know, half a year later they had this like, little class and they invited me to speak.

I spoke and  there was plastic cups on the table with water and whatever, and she got up and went to get me a glass cup. ’cause she remembered that I said it when she was on the live Zoom thing. It was so great. It was so cute. That’s so sweet.  And then my daughter, you know, my daughters,  when I say, Hey, can I have a cup of water?

They will go and get glass specifically because I said it. So getting to know what works for you and what makes you feel good about drinking the water. I mean, listen, the water really tastes different when you drink it from glass. Really? It tastes so different. The other thing that you were mentioning, have it near you.

So I love drinking water, but I just too lazy to get up.  So, so before I sit down to work on my computer, I get a pitcher of water and I put it next to me, and then I keep drinking. And then when it’s empty, I feel it and I drink and I feel it and I drink. And I, and it’s also fun to watch the pitcher go down.

’cause really, you feel like, no way. There’s no way I could finish that picture. But you can, if you’re sitting down to work and you’re writing emails and you’re doing all this like taggy things, like you could totally finish a picture of water.  Yeah. I love that. And I love that. I love that list  of writing things that you love.

It makes you happy and I feel a lot of people are surprised when we talk about health and, and healthy habits. And I bring up that exactly thing in, in Hebrew. We say, Bali, what do I want? What do I wanna do? I wanna do I wanna, like we say Bali, do I want this? Do I want to go work out five times a week?

Maybe I don’t want to. Maybe I just saw people on TikTok and I thought, this is what, this is what I need to do. No, you know what, like if you know yourself, you’re like, no, I wanna work out at home twice a week. Okay, well let’s find a way for you to do that. You know? So I just love the, that list. I love that idea.

And also, that’s kinda going back and circling back  to Maimonide and his approach. And which by the way, I believe that as soon as this episode will be onto your podcast platform my book will be published and ready about Maimonide and his approach and, and just Jewish healthy living approach.

So, so he was also talking again about personalization and he was also talking a lot about mental health as well. And this is a complete different topic and I know we’re like, with the time now we’re limited, but he was also talking about mental health and one of the things there was, was really taking time for yourself.

 He was an advocate of being alone  and not being alone of a sense of like just sitting down in a corner in a dark corner. And nowadays we know it from the, the concept of hitbodedut  but he was really talking about spending time, maybe not two hours a day, but spending time by yourself, by like, even if it’s 10 minutes, waking up at 10 minutes earlier to just spend time with yourself and, and, and connect to your truth, your inner self.

Right?  And that can set the tone. If it’s in the morning, that could set the tone for the whole day. If you can do it in the morning, do it in the afternoon or whenever, go out to nature. Do that in nature. Just get to know yourself. It, it can solve so many things.  It can help your health, it can help your body, mental health, your business, your marriage, your everything.

Truly, yes, yes, yes. I support this message people.  So when I was pregnant,  I pregnant with, with number seven. Now I have eight kids, but the previous one I did not know that, by the way. You didn’t know that. I’m like, oh my God, you are, you’re my hero. I just wanna say that out loud in public. You are my hero. 

Thank you. Thank you. So I started this business before I was pregnant with number seven. Like when I, no, when I was pregnant with number six is when everything started, like my whole pivot happened when I was pregnant with my number six. And then I went from graphic designer to advisor and coach and, you know, got really specific about marriage and business.

 It was that whole process. But then I finally was like running a business when before I was pregnant with number seven.  And then I got pregnant with number seven and the time when I was alone with myself and my thoughts was between three and 4:00 AM For some reason, my pregnancy didn’t let me sleep, and  only when I needed downloads, like it wasn’t  every day, but I would wake up, see my husband sleeping.

Everybody’s quiet, everything is like, you know, pitch black and I’m like, well, do I get up or do I just sit here? But like, I started getting all these ideas and I was like, I gotta go write them down. So I would get up and journal for an hour and just get it all outta my head and then go back to sleep.

And it just started being this thing that I do. I got so many downloads that pregnancy. This whole business is based on that season of my life.  The name of my method, the Four Steps to Creating Flow, my Connected for real, my four pillars Flow Fine, you know, fly, like all the masterminds I had, oh my gosh, everything.

It’s just like boosh, all this amazing ideas and  I, I don’t know why I thought of that. I’m like,  you setting like first thing in the morning or something or whatever. I’m like, just take it when it comes. Okay. People like, really, it’s such gold. It’s such gold. So if you have to get yourself outta bed and sit on the couch for, you know, for half an hour or two an hour and just like journal, do it.

Recently, I, I had a baby 11 months ago, so recently I’ve been going for a walk every day after dropping off the kids. And  I go all the way to the edge of the town where I could see like all the view and the trees and the sun, and the sky and, you know, and the mountains and the towns beyond us.

It was like, so fun, so fun. And, and I just put on a timer for 10 minutes, right? And I put a timer, and I, I just, I talk to God. I’m like, Hey, good morning. What’s up today? These are the things I want from you. These are the things I’m worried about. These are the things, whatever. And it’s just like whatever comes up.

A lot of gratitude Lately, a lot of gratitude lately has been coming up, so yeah, highly recommended.  I love this. And by the way, this is something, this is like a hack when you live in America. Because in Israel you can walk a lot a lot more, at least from where I’m living in Kansas City. So the driving, when I drive by myself, when I’m by myself in the car that’s when I talk to God.

So that’s when I take time for myself. I’m like, Hey, God, what’s up? You know what I’m grateful, but let’s talk. You know? So or another, another hack is in the shower. Sometimes in the shower it’s like I’m by myself at the, the water, you know, there’s energy to the water that’s. Coming down. And that’s, that’s the time to like, whew, you know, all the good ideas come in the shower.

You know why? Because you’re finally off your phone, right? Like, you finally could think just quiet for like 10 minutes, two minutes, whatever it is. So yeah, it’s, this is amazing. This is amazing. A lot of people say also like Shabbat, they get such downloads because they’re finally not distracted. So I think we’re coming back to like. 

There is a lot that we’re talking about. Let’s wrap it up because I just realized we’ve been talking for an hour, and even though  this can go on forever we’re going to bring it back to the way we started. We don’t do overwhelm around here. I don’t want you to listen to this podcast and walk out being, oh my gosh, I have to change everything about my life.

I need to drink more water. I need to do it this way. I need to dah, dah, dah. I need to start moving more. I need to talk to God, and I need to stop, you know, and I, and I’m scrolling too much and my phone is in my room, and, you know, and like, okay, that’s just too much. Your brain is trying to do that on purpose so that you don’t do anything, right?

It’s like swimming in the overwhelm. Like, get out, take a deep breath. I don’t care what you do, but just pick one thing and try it once and that’s it. Okay. That’s all I want. And then send me an email for accountability. Be like, Hey, I listened to this podcast and you said to send you an email when we picked one thing and did it once.

So here’s what I picked and here’s how I did it. Boom. Okay. And then you’re gonna feel so proud of yourself and I’m going to be able to celebrate you and cheer you on and be like, woo-hoo. Okay.  It’s so powerful, so powerful when you get out of the overwhelm and really just celebrate one thing because you’re worth it. 

I love this. Yes, exactly. Exactly. Exactly. I I couldn’t agree more. And cc me on that email ’cause I’m rooting for you. One thing, just one thing. Do it once, see what happens. And  you got this. It’s, it’s possible. It’s all possible. So definitely. I’m, I’m with you. Thank you for wrapping it up so beautifully.

Yes. Thank you so much for coming. How can people find you? So all the social media platform I am Remi Haik. My website is remihaik.com and I usually hang out the most on Instagram, so if you’re on Instagram, come join me there. And yeah, and once this episode will be on your platforms the book will be out.

So we’ll get the, the link for the book. So that will be exciting. And definitely find me there. That’s exciting. I’m so excited about the book. I’m like waiting for it. Thank  you. Okay, so thank you everyone for coming and joining us. Thank you for being here. And so awesome. I can’t wait to hear how you’re doing with your one thing.

And please come back next week for another amazing episode  and don’t forget to be connected for real.  Thank you.

 And that’s it! Thank you for listening to the very end. I would love if you can leave a review and subscribe to the podcast. Those are things that tell the algorithm this is a good podcast and make sure to suggest it to others. Wouldn’t it be amazing if more people became more connected for real?  And now take a moment and think of someone who might benefit from this episode. 

Can you share it with them?  I am Robinson Bat chen Grossman from  connectedforreal. com. Thank you so much for listening and don’t forget you can be connected for real.